BATMAN

int. traditional batcave

BATMAN stands next to his batmobile and uses his batcomputer.
he's sometimes Bruce Wayne and sometimes batman. alltimes orphan.

BATMAN
this is now a safe city. I have
punched a penguin into prison.

ALFRED, batman's loyal batler, carries a tray of goth ham.

ALFRED
eat a dinner, mattress Wayne.

an explosion explodes. THE JOKER and TWO-FACE enter the cave.
joker is a clown but insane. two-face is a man but attorney.

BATMAN
no! it is two-face and one-face.
they hate me for being a bat.

batman throws Alfred at two-face. two-face flips Alfred like
a coin. Alfred lands heads up which means two-face goes home.

BATMAN (CON'T)
It is just you and I, the joker.
bat vs clown. moral enemies.

THE JOKER
I am such a freak. society is bad.
you drink water, I drink anarchy.

BATMAN
I drink bats just like a bat would!

batman looks around for his parents, but they are still dead.
this makes him have anger. he fires a batrocket. the joker
deflects it with his sick sense of humor. a clownly power.

THE JOKER
I have never followed a rule. that
is my rule. do you follow? i don't.

BATMAN
Alfred, give birth to robin.

Alfred begins the process since it is his job. the joker now
has a present in his hand. he juggles it over to batman.

THE JOKER
happy batday, birthman.

batman opens the present since he's a good guy. It contains a
coupon for new parents, but it is expired. this is a joker joke.