A Dusky Rose (Collection of Short Stories)
written by Winter Lily
Short stories that I've written over time. In chronological order. Trigger warnings are: Suicide, depression, anxiety, murder. I will write individual warnings for each story. Feedback is welcome
Last Updated
05/31/21
Chapters
12
Reads
500
What Do You See? - Poppy
Chapter 4
Dedication to Poppy - For being an absolutely beautiful person. You only need to be you
TRIGGER WARNINGS: Depression, etc
(15 August, 2017)
I didn’t see you
I didn’t see you today, but I thought of you. I was told you were gone, gone forever. You were the only one that truly knew me and now you have left. Left me, left this world. People will say that it is best to get over it, but it’s a lot harder than that. It’s a lot harder to forget you then they would hope. They tried to give me advice. They said that it would make me happier. They said go into your room and take a moment to relax. They said take a look at yourself and the mess you’ve put yourself into. They said that I used to be happy all the time and I should go back to being that. They said to just take five minutes and come back again. They said to look in the mirror and show yourself how lucky you are.
I said that I’m always in my room. I said that I always analyze myself. I said that inside I was not always happy, I was breaking. I said that I’ve been “just taking five minutes” for years now. I said that mirrors lie.
I went straight home after school that night. It was going to be cold, but I opened the window anyway. I let the cold breeze fly through my room and take the warmth with it. I didn’t need the warmth that night, in fact I welcomed the cold. I put my bag down and I closed the door. Today had been like every other day, except I didn’t even have you to help me get through it. It was full of lies and fake smiles. Full of assignments and saying “I’m just tired.” That is the only truth they know about me; that I’m always tired. Except, they don’t know why I am tired. They don’t know about the complete breakdowns I have in bathrooms throughout the day. They don’t know that I feel like I’m about to be crushed into a million pieces. They ask “what do you see when you look in the mirror?”
I see a shell. A shell with long brown hair, dark brown eyes and freckles scattered across its face. People call it my body, they call it a girl, they call it me, but I call it The Shell. The shell that I am stuck in, the shell that I put masks over, the shell that I am hidden in. I know I am not the skin that wraps around the bones that people call mine. I am the turmoil of thoughts, the bunches of dreams, the pools of despair, the pieces of people that have loved and left me. I am not The Shell. I am something else.
So, what do I see when I look in the mirror? I see The Shell that disguises me. I see The Shell that disguises my soul. I see The Shell that is so easy to hide behind. I see The Shell that sometimes controls me and sometimes lets me control it. I see The Shell that everyone thinks is me when it really isn’t.
TRIGGER WARNINGS: Depression, etc
(15 August, 2017)
I didn’t see you
I didn’t see you today, but I thought of you. I was told you were gone, gone forever. You were the only one that truly knew me and now you have left. Left me, left this world. People will say that it is best to get over it, but it’s a lot harder than that. It’s a lot harder to forget you then they would hope. They tried to give me advice. They said that it would make me happier. They said go into your room and take a moment to relax. They said take a look at yourself and the mess you’ve put yourself into. They said that I used to be happy all the time and I should go back to being that. They said to just take five minutes and come back again. They said to look in the mirror and show yourself how lucky you are.
I said that I’m always in my room. I said that I always analyze myself. I said that inside I was not always happy, I was breaking. I said that I’ve been “just taking five minutes” for years now. I said that mirrors lie.
I went straight home after school that night. It was going to be cold, but I opened the window anyway. I let the cold breeze fly through my room and take the warmth with it. I didn’t need the warmth that night, in fact I welcomed the cold. I put my bag down and I closed the door. Today had been like every other day, except I didn’t even have you to help me get through it. It was full of lies and fake smiles. Full of assignments and saying “I’m just tired.” That is the only truth they know about me; that I’m always tired. Except, they don’t know why I am tired. They don’t know about the complete breakdowns I have in bathrooms throughout the day. They don’t know that I feel like I’m about to be crushed into a million pieces. They ask “what do you see when you look in the mirror?”
I see a shell. A shell with long brown hair, dark brown eyes and freckles scattered across its face. People call it my body, they call it a girl, they call it me, but I call it The Shell. The shell that I am stuck in, the shell that I put masks over, the shell that I am hidden in. I know I am not the skin that wraps around the bones that people call mine. I am the turmoil of thoughts, the bunches of dreams, the pools of despair, the pieces of people that have loved and left me. I am not The Shell. I am something else.
So, what do I see when I look in the mirror? I see The Shell that disguises me. I see The Shell that disguises my soul. I see The Shell that is so easy to hide behind. I see The Shell that sometimes controls me and sometimes lets me control it. I see The Shell that everyone thinks is me when it really isn’t.
