The Mental Wonderings of a Depressed Teenager
written by Luna Silverprint
My real life thoughts as I battle depression. Please keep in mind that this will be entirly truthful.
Last Updated
05/31/21
Chapters
5
Reads
583
1/23/17
Chapter 4
Yesterday I wanted to write, but didn't have the time.
About a week and a half ago my dad randomly brought up medication (for depression). I was slightly confused because perviously my parents have been super against medication because of side effects.
My dad was ALMOST suggesting it, but yesterday everything changed. He said that at my next meeting with my psycologist I should bring it up.
I guess my parents thought I could get better by myself by now. Does that mean they're losing faith in me? I'm still trying to decide of I am comfortable taking medication.
I'm scared. I heard somewhere that there's some people who once they start taking medication, they don't stop. I don't want to be depressed and sad because it feels terrible, but I dont want to have to rely on medication for the rest of my life.
Im trying to decide whether or not Im OKAY with taking medication. In the end it is my decision, I just don't know what to do and I scared. I didn't think I was depressed enough to take medication! I thought I was getting better, but the past week has been my worse since starting therapy.
What's happening!?! Why do I feel so sad? My life is fine! Why do I want to cut when I know it doesn't help? Why do I want to die? Nothing makes sense.
I've told my friends about what Im feeling, but I'm scared to tell them when I actually have suicidal thoughts. My mom would always act strange after I told her. I don't know how they would react to the medication dilemma. Maybe I'll ask what they would do.
About a week and a half ago my dad randomly brought up medication (for depression). I was slightly confused because perviously my parents have been super against medication because of side effects.
My dad was ALMOST suggesting it, but yesterday everything changed. He said that at my next meeting with my psycologist I should bring it up.
I guess my parents thought I could get better by myself by now. Does that mean they're losing faith in me? I'm still trying to decide of I am comfortable taking medication.
I'm scared. I heard somewhere that there's some people who once they start taking medication, they don't stop. I don't want to be depressed and sad because it feels terrible, but I dont want to have to rely on medication for the rest of my life.
Im trying to decide whether or not Im OKAY with taking medication. In the end it is my decision, I just don't know what to do and I scared. I didn't think I was depressed enough to take medication! I thought I was getting better, but the past week has been my worse since starting therapy.
What's happening!?! Why do I feel so sad? My life is fine! Why do I want to cut when I know it doesn't help? Why do I want to die? Nothing makes sense.
I've told my friends about what Im feeling, but I'm scared to tell them when I actually have suicidal thoughts. My mom would always act strange after I told her. I don't know how they would react to the medication dilemma. Maybe I'll ask what they would do.
