Remus didn’t finish his letter home until Sunday evening. It would arrive later than he had planned, but it would be much more interesting to read. He told his mum and dad all about his three new friends; how they had spent the entire weekend exploring the castle and grounds together. He left out the part about James’ fabulous invisibility cloak, which he had stuck under his robes Friday evening. They had used it to sneak into the upper classmen’s social. He didn’t think his mum would appreciate anything that involved rule breaking or possibilities for detention. But it sure had been fun and a little exciting, especially when Sirius knocked a bowl of pumpkin juice punch off the end of a table onto a girl sitting on a couch beside it. It was the lovely blonde Slytherin Remus remembered seeing at the sorting. While she had looked stunned when Sirius had sorted into Gryffindor, she looked absolutely livid when she jumped up, soaked to her toes in punch. Remus couldn’t help noticing how the filmy punch-soaked robes clung to her, and he felt his ears grow hot. Apparently, his friends noticed too. James let out a rather loud whistle before Sirius managed to put a hand over his mouth to shut him up.
Remus was very thankful they were hidden under the cloak when it became obvious none of the upper classmen thought it had been an accidental dousing. A tall Slytherin with long fair hair started accusing Fabian Prewitt, Gideon’s older brother, the Head Boy from Hufflepuff. Before the four boys had a chance to get out into the corridor, hexes had started flying.

Remus felt a little guilty, even though he hadn’t knocked the punch on the girl. But it had been rather thrilling and when Sirius explained why he had done it, Remus felt a bit better. Although, he did feel bad about all the innocent bystanders who would probably be serving detention for the fight that it caused.

“That girl is my cousin, Narcissa. She’s fifth year and a royal pain in the arse,” said Sirius after they returned to the safety of the common room. “She and her sister, Bellatrix…now there’s a scary witch.”

“Does Bellatrix look like Narcissa?” asked James. “Maybe we could pour punch on her, too.”

“Oh, you don’t want to mess with cousin Bellatrix. She is wicked in the traditional sense of the word. The two don’t look much alike. Bell is dark-haired like the Blacks. Narcissa takes after her mum. Then there is a third sister, Andromeda. She’s dark too. But she’s alright. Actually, she’s about the only decent person in the entire family. The Blacks are about as happy with her right now as they are with me because she’s dating a Muggle-born. First, I sort into Gryffindor and now, possibly a Muggle-born in the family. Can you imagine the horror? They can barely show their faces in polite society,” Sirius said darkly. Remus got the feeling Sirius didn’t get along very well with his family.

* * *

Soon, the end of September drew near and with it, the full moon. As Remus considered his first transformation at school, he was beginning to think things had turned out even better than he could have planned. By living in a room with one group and hanging out with another, he felt he was less likely to be missed during his absences. Each group would simply think he was with the other. He intentionally spent time in his own room studying, away from his three friends, hoping this would further disguise his absence. Plus, he really needed to study and James and Sirius tended to distract him. 

As he was escorted to the Whomping Willow by the school nurse, Madam Pomfrey, he felt even more anxious about the full moon than usual. He worried what the nurse would think of him when she saw what he did to himself. He wondered if she had ever seen the aftermath of a werewolf transformation before. But she didn’t seem to look down on him, even though she knew what he was, and that was comforting. 

He wondered how his mother was. He felt sure she was even more worried than he was. 

“Madam Pomfrey?” he said quietly. “Will you send my mum an owl as soon as I’m back? Just to let her know I’m alright. She’ll be worried.”

“Of course, Remus, now don’t worry about that. I’ll see you in the morning.” 

She prodded a knot on the tree trunk and it became very still. He climbed down between its roots to a long dark tunnel under the Hogwarts grounds. He finally entered the old abandoned house Professor Dumbledore had told him he would use. It looked decrepit, but the Headmaster had assured him the building was much sturdier than it appeared and would serve his needs well. He looked around at the room. He was very grateful to Dumbledore for providing it and he hated it immediately, just as he hated the room in his parents’ cellar. But it was necessary. He removed his robes and folded them neatly before placing them under a chair in the other room to prevent the wolf from destroying them. Then he waited, but only for a few minutes. The nurse had timed his arrival so he wouldn’t have long to dwell on his fears. As the pain wracked his body, he thought about the villagers of Hogsmeade. He knew they must be able to hear his screams and he tried to stifle them, but his effort was futile…

Madam Pomfrey was there when he awoke to help him back to the hospital wing. It wasn’t the same as having his mother to comfort him, but he was rather glad the nurse didn’t baby him. She was kind and seemed very skilled in treating his injuries which was all he really needed. She treated him the way he imagined she would treat anyone who was ill or injured. He liked that. He felt sure he and Madam Pomfrey would get along quite well. 

When he returned to the dormitory, his friends thought he had simply fallen ill that morning causing him to miss his classes while his room mates thought he was off the night before with his three friends, as usual. All in all, things couldn’t have gone much better.

But as the year went on and the four friends became closer, the others started looking for him if he disappeared for more than a few hours. He started having to come up with explanations for his absences. He hated lying, but the thought of losing them was much worse. So, he lied…and the fun they had together made it worth it.

* * *

They spent a good bit of time pulling pranks on Sirius’ cousins and their friends. Of course, the animosity between them did nothing to endear the four Gryffindors to the house of Slytherin and vice versa. Remus wasn’t stupid enough to do anything too outrageous, as he didn’t want to have his arse hexed by the considerably older and more experienced Slytherins for no good reason. He also didn’t want his mum and dad getting owls from school because he was being foolish. Unfortunately, James and Sirius couldn’t seem to help themselves. They were already gaining a reputation for being mischief makers and by the end of the year, had spent numerous evenings in detention with Professor McGonagall and a few hours with Madam Pomfrey in hospital.

It had been the best year of Remus’ life. When he realized that James, Sirius, and Peter were planning on having a room with him the next year, he couldn’t wait, until he remembered it would make hiding the transformations from them much more difficult. But how could he tell them he didn’t want to live with them? 

And so, as second year began, he was sharing a room with his friends. It was starting off as another great year. But as the first full moon approached he became very worried. It wasn’t going to be easy to hide his affliction from them. They were very clever and it didn’t take them long to figure things out.

On the morning of the full moon in October, he came back to the room after visiting the toilet and found the three sitting on the sides of their beds staring at him.

“Feeling sick again, Moony?” asked James.

“Yeah, a litt…” Remus hesitated and looked at the boys nervously. “What did you call me?” he whispered.

“Just a little nickname we thought up. Do you like it?” asked James darkly.

“It was a toss up between that and …what was it, James? Stupid prat?” said Sirius, glaring at Remus. 

“I also liked idiot git, myself,” added James.

Remus saw Peter bite back a nervous smirk as he looked back and forth between the boys. Remus felt the room closing in on him and sat heavily on the edge of his bed so he wouldn’t collapse. The effects of the moon were already taking a toll on him.

“What are you talking about?” he asked warily. He hoped beyond hope that somehow this was a mistake, that he wasn’t about to lose the only friends he’d ever had.

“Well, what else would you call someone who lies to his mates and doesn’t trust them with something that important?” asked Sirius angrily.

“Or who thinks his mates are so stupid they wouldn’t figure it out?” added James.

“What did you think we’d do Remus, turn tail and run? Or rat you out?” hissed Sirius.

Remus nodded dismally. That was exactly what he feared.

“Bloody hell, Remus,” said James, shaking his head slowly. “I thought you knew us better than that.”

And so, his secret was out…at least to his three friends. They gave him a hard time for not trusting them, but they didn’t abandon him. If anything, they became closer, and Remus was happier than he could ever have imagined. Having it in the open was a huge burden off of him. He now had friends that accepted him for what he was. He learned that they had done a little research when they started figuring things out, but at first he got the impression they found it rather cool…no, that wasn’t the right word…intriguing that they had a friend with such a dark and dangerous secret. So Remus gave them a lesson in lycanthropy. Knowing them as he did, he wanted to make sure they were well aware of how dangerous he was in his transformed state. He didn’t want them trying to sneak a peek and end up his evening meal some night because they got bored. 

He was happy when they were comfortable enough to make jokes about it, such as how they would set Moony on anyone who made them particularly angry or:

“Can’t you just eat Professor McGonagall so we can actually get away with something around here?” James asked as he and Sirius set off to yet another detention. 

They would tease him about his mood swings and that time of the month problems. That was so much better than being pitied. And, the nickname stuck.

But he wanted them to know there really was nothing cool about being a werewolf. Lycanthropy was a horrible thing to live with and they had to promise him not to try anything foolhardy. Still, it was hard to convince twelve year old boys that raging wild beasts weren’t at least a little cool.

As they started visiting him in the hospital wing on the mornings after his transformations, they got to witness a little of the horror involved in his life. They could see his condition before Madam Pomfrey’s treatments took affect. He didn’t like them seeing him like that, but if it helped them understand, he would allow it. Plus, he found their presence comforting. Not only were they not repulsed by him, they were becoming rather protective and it seemed to create a deeper bond between them all.

He awoke one morning, following a full moon, to the sound of their raised voices. He wished he hadn’t because the pain was intense. He must have looked particularly bad to have them so upset.

“Why can’t anybody do anything?” cried James. “Is anybody even trying?”

“Mr. Potter, calm yourself,” said Madam Pomfrey firmly.

“But look at him! This is bull sh…”

“Mr. Black!” hissed the nurse. “If you can’t be quiet, I’m going to have to insist you leave. You’ll wake him and he won’t thank you for it. He needs to sleep through this part.”

That quieted them. Then, he heard Peter’s voice whisper, “Can’t you restrain him or something?”

The nurse sighed heavily. “It’s been tried. Not on Remus, but on others…one killed himself trying to break free…I think it was his heart… another practically chewed his own arm off to get the bindings loose. And magic just won’t work on them.”

“There just has to be something,” said James heavily.

“You lot have to understand, there isn’t a wild animal who would take kindly to being caged and I’m afraid, during the full moon, your friend is the wildest of the wild, but we can’t very well let him roam free, can we?” she said sadly. “Now, off you go. He needs his rest. You can see him after lunch.” She had returned to her usual brisk self.

Days later, Remus learned of a plan they had concocted after leaving his bedside that Saturday. After returning to the room, the three had engaged in a serious brainstorming session, determined to find a way to help him. It had ended with them spending the rest of their afternoon in the library, a place James and Sirius made every effort to avoid. But they needed information. So they risked their reputations and spent the day holed up between the stacks trying to avoid the large number of Ravenclaws who were there. 

It didn’t take a genius to realize the nurse was right and Remus’ wolf would probably be a lot better if he could run wild. But, how? They learned the werewolf was only a threat to humans and one thing led to another. Before dinner, James had retrieved his invisibility cloak and was searching the restricted section for book titles on the Animagus Transformation. He wouldn’t try to remove the books because he was sure Madam Pince probably had an alarm or tracking system on them. It was almost Christmas break and they would have to try to get hold of the books at Flourish and Blotts or something.

“I bet I can get Andromeda to get me one of these for Christmas,” said Sirius, glancing at the list of titles. “Maybe Uncle Alphard, too. They feel sorry for me since everyone in the family took my sorting so badly.” Sirius grinned. 

“Won’t they be suspicious?” asked Peter.

“I can tell them I’m interested because of McGonagall. Or that I need them for a report for extra credit for all my detentions. They’ll believe that.”

Remus had listened to their plan to become Animagi so that they could at least keep him company during his transformation. He was very grateful, but he knew it was really dangerous and…illegal.

”Look, I really appreciate what you want to do, but…” Remus said softly as he glanced at the excited faces of his three best friends. “I can’t let you do this for me.”

“What do you mean you can’t let us do it?” asked Sirius haughtily.

“Sirius, you can not do this. It is far too dangerous…don’t scoff! The Animagus Transformation can go horribly wrong. I don’t want to be responsible for that!” Remus said adamantly.

“You won’t be. It’s our decision! Besides, we aren’t stupid! We aren’t just going to jump in and do it without a lot of preparation,” said James. “We’ve researched it, we know the risks.”

“Then you should know it isn’t worth it! You don’t even know if this crazy idea would work. How can you be sure the wolf won’t know you are really human and decide to attack one of you?” Remus argued.

“Because we won’t be human! The Animagus Transformation is a TRANSFORMATION not just a disguise,” countered Sirius.

“Well, how can you be so sure I…the wolf…won’t attack you anyway? 

“Moony, you know better than any of us that werewolves only prey on humans,” said Peter, finally entering the fray. “According to all the books on lycanthropy, they only eat other animals if they are literally starving.”

“So we’ll make sure your tummy’s full before moonrise!” joked James.

Remus didn’t laugh. “I also know they have been known to fight with other animals, particularly dogs and things that come to the aid of humans!” said Remus hotly.

“And nothing happens to the dog that a good gamekeeper can’t cure!” snapped Sirius. “So you don’t have to worry about infecting us! Give it up, Moony. We’ve made up our minds.”

“And my opinion counts for nothing?” Remus asked.

“Since it’s a lousy opinion…nah it doesn’t!” said James drolly. 

Remus looked around in frustration. He could tell that they were determined to go ahead against his advice. 

“Well what about the opinion of the Department of Magical Law Enforcement then? What you are going to do is illegal!” said Remus. “I don’t know about you three, but I don’t want to see you end up in Azkaban!”

“If it works, we can go register,” said James. “If it doesn’t…”

“It won’t really matter,” finished Sirius with a fatalistic shrug.

Remus took a deep breath and sighed heavily. How did he ever end up with such insane, stubborn…wonderful friends?

* * *

Sirius returned from the holidays looking very satisfied with himself as he tossed two large books on the foot of Remus’ bed. James grabbed them and read the titles excitedly.

“Animagus Transformation, The Authoritative Guide and So You Want To Be An Animagus: Fifteen Helpful Hints to Prevent Becoming a Mutated Freak. This is going to be so bloody amazing!” he cried. “Wonder what we’ll all be?”

Their egos didn’t know it yet, but it would be a long time before any of them would find out.

* * *

Months turned into years as the boys grew. They were wonderful and exciting times. 

James became a Chaser on the house Quidditch team when a position finally opened up in their third year. He immediately stood out as a star when he led the team in their first victory over Slytherin in three and a half years. Unfortunately, this only added to the animosity that had been steadily building between the two houses since their first year. There was a particularly hostile rivalry building between James and Severus Snape who played for the Slytherin team though not to James’ standard. This seemed to irk Snape to no end and he couldn’t seem to stop himself sniping at James, who, of course, wouldn’t let him get away with it. As time went on, the feud seemed to spread to include James’ friends, though Remus tried his best to stay out of it.

Remus loved most of his classes and while he wasn’t awful at anything, he did struggle a bit in Potions. Defense Against the Dark Arts was his favorite, as he had expected it to be and he was quite good at Care of Magical Creatures. His Dad would appreciate that. Peter, on the other hand struggled with it, as well as a few others. Then, there were James and Sirius. They didn’t struggle with anything. Well, except the Animagus transformation…and girls.

Yes, the dreaded day had somehow sneaked up on them all. It had really started happening way back in second year when they would talk about girls and look at magazines Sirius would nick from the common room. Some of the women in them were incredibly beautiful and he had started having some rather vivid dreams about the beautiful gypsy princess from his favorite childhood storybook and…well, Remus had finally forced himself to confront his father over the Christmas holidays and he had gottenthe talk. Crikey, that had been awkward.

Then, early in third year, during a Hogsmeade weekend, Sirius had wandered off to get a butterbeer and returned half an hour later looking dazed and sporting a vibrant love bite on his neck.

“Bloody hell, Sirius,” whispered James in amazement. “What happened?”

“I’m not really sure,” answered Sirius, a rather goofy grin on his face. “One minute, I’m standing at the bar waiting, the next, I’m in the broom cupboard in the hallway with Cornelia…You know, that sixth year Ravenclaw?”

“Blimey,” breathed Peter. “What were you doing in there?”

The three others looked at him pointedly.

“O-O-Oh,” drawled Peter with dawning realization.

Remus had to laugh and James rolled his eyes in disgust.

“Jeez, Peter,” James shook his head and turned back to Sirius. “So…what was it like?”

Sirius considered for a moment and started to smile. “It was…kind of…nice. Actually, it was very nice…and really warm.”

There it was, Sirius was the first to snog a girl. That was no big shock and from then on, Sirius struggled with girls. Well, struggled to keep girls away more like it. He was the epitome of tall dark and handsome. Sirius was smart, and from one of the oldest and wealthiest pureblood families in the country. Girls were crazy for him, even if he was only thirteen.

It took the other three longer to work up the nerve to approach a girl. Sirius enjoyed goading them, but they were well aware of the fact that he wasn’t exactly Mr. Nerves-of-steel regarding girls, himself. How much courage did it take to let them drag you off to the broom cupboard? Remus thought the idea was a little frightening, but nothing compared to the prospect of putting yourself out there for total rejection. 

But, as the weeks went on, Sirius seemed to become more comfortable in his role as the class Lothario and never ceased to amaze Remus and their friends with his incredible ability to turn seemingly normal girls into putty with just a smile. Before the end of term, Sirius had gained quite a reputation as a ladies’s man and Madam Rosmerta had threatened to put a Sirius Black alarm on her broom cupboard if he didn’t stay out of it. She had also come to the rescue of a girl Sirius had set his sights on during the last Hogsmeade visit of the term in December.

Sirius had spotted the girl almost immediately upon entering the Three Broomsticks. Of course, she would have been rather hard to miss, standing at the edge of the bar talking with some fifth year girls. Remus couldn’t place her and felt sure that he would have noticed her before now if she had been at Hogwarts. Still, she looked vaguely familiar. He was reminded of that beautiful gypsy princess from his story book. The girl’s dark hair was pulled away from her face in a ponytail and her skin was tanned and golden in contrast to the pale faces of the students around her.

Remus and his friends had barely settled into their seats when Sirius was off to make his conquest. Remus couldn’t help but be impressed as he saw the girl smile bashfully while her cheeks reddened at something Sirius must have said. Things seemed to be going well for Sirius until Rosmerta walked out of the pub kitchen and yelled.

“Lindi, Aunt Ronnie wants you to go with her!” Rosmerta threw Sirius a warning smirk as the girl disappeared down the hall to the rental rooms. 

A feeling of d�ja vu washed over Remus. Why did he feel he had met this girl? Maybe it was wishful thinking.

Before he could sort it out, Sirius had rejoined them and Rosmerta walked over. She gazed at Sirius bemusedly.

“You are barking up the wrong tree with that one, Mr. Black,” she said. 

“Who is she?” asked Sirius.

“She’s my cousin and she’s just visiting. And trust me…you don’t want her Aunt Veronica after you.” Rosmerta chuckled and walked back to the bar.

Shortly, a formidable looking old woman dressed in a thick travel cloak with a holly circled witches hat came through the pub followed by the girl…Lindi. She, too, was dressed in a winter cloak. Her face was framed by a fuzzy wool trimmed hat. The ivory wool highlighted the glow of her skin and darkness of her eyes. As she walked past, she caught Remus watching her and her cheeks flushed. He felt his own going a little hot and felt a strange sense of relief that Sirius’ back was to her. When she smiled and threw him a tiny wave he realized with a jolt where he had seen her before. She had been on platform 9 and � when he had first boarded the Hogwarts Express. He found himself wondering about her again: why didn’t she ever come to Hogwarts…where was her mum…where was she living that she would be so tanned in the middle of the winter…But she walked out into the snow covered street of Hogsmeade and vanished. He thought about her from time to time over the next few weeks but she soon faded into memory as his adventures at Hogwarts continued. 

Of course, as happens with teenage boys, many of the adventures included or were centered on girls. At first, they simply consisted of pranks played on girls. Sirius might have been comfortable with other types of adventure with the opposite sex but the rest of them were still getting up their nerve.

Not surprisingly, James would be the next to fall victim to the lure of females. His increasing Quidditch stardom made him more desirable all the time and by the end of third year, he managed to have dates fairly regularly, though not with any one person. He and Sirius were definitely playing the field. However, as fourth year progressed, James decided he wanted to go out with Lily Evans. Unfortunately, she did not feel the same and that made James only want her more. Lily was a protective type and obviously disapproved of those who showed little or no compassion for those less capable than themselves. James and Sirius had very little patience with people they saw as nuisances and even less for those who actually had the gall to provoke them in any way. The two actually seemed to enjoy any opportunity to practice their growing repertoire of jinxes and hexes on any and all that happened to cross them. Sometimes it made Remus uncomfortable, but he wasn’t their boss, and they weren’t really hurting anyone after all. It just wasn’t worth getting into an argument. Still, it was enough to keep Lily uninterested. At least, Remus assumed that’s what kept her from going out with James. What else could it be? Otherwise, James was a great guy and loads of girls seemed to be interested in him. But Lily Evans was having none of it. 

Now, Peter…well, Peter had some self esteem issues when it came to girls. He was going to take a while, but he was only fourteen after all.

Then there was Remus. His situation was a bit more complicated than mere self esteem problems. He was actually fairly secure in his abilities and appearance. He got good marks in most of his classes and was gaining a reputation as one of the best duelers in the Dueling Club. He knew he was no where near as handsome as Sirius. Who was? But, on a good day, he knew more than a few girls would be willing to go out with him. He was not quite as tall as Sirius, but a little taller than James. Of course, he was more slender than either of them, a side effect of low appetite from his illness and he often looked pale and fatigued. But he was alright. His mother always said he had pretty eyes anyway and it had been confirmed by Lily Evans with whom he was actually friends; it nearly drove James crazy that Remus couldn’t help him get a date.

“James, I’m not cupid. Lily has a mind of her own. You know that,” Remus would say as James would smirk in disgust.

Anyway, on the train back from Christmas break in fourth year, Lily had told Remus that a fifth year Ravenclaw she knew from her Charms Club had a crush on him and thought he had dreamy eyes. He had nearly spontaneously combusted he had blushed so hard.

But Remus had a big secret to keep and dating would only complicate matters. Still, he was almost fifteen and he really wanted to know what it was like to kiss a girl. So, with a little prodding from his friends and Lily, he asked the Ravenclaw, Emmeline Vance, to the Valentines’ dance. He knew her vaguely from Dueling Club, though she was on a different team. She seemed like a nice person and he thought she was attractive. She wasn’t his gypsy princess, but she was tall, slender, with a fairly pretty face and she was very smart. He liked that. 

The dance was alright, and after spending some time together, he found that he liked her enough to look forward to kissing her goodnight… if he could get up the nerve. When he walked her back to the Ravenclaw tower, there were people milling about, so he talked to her until the coast was clear. He didn’t want his first kiss to be in front of an audience. He was very nervous about it, but when he hesitated, she leaned in and kissed him. He didn’t exactly see fireworks, but it was very nice, and he felt his face grow warm, just as Sirius said. 

Remus went out with Emmeline a few more times, but there just wasn’t a spark and they drifted into a comfortable friendship. He hoped all his “breakups” would be so smooth; not that he expected to have that many. 

In no time, Remus’ fourth year was over. He couldn’t believe how time was flying.