At some point we must learn what makes us who we are. I had always heard my mother tell the younger kids this idea. The thought that everyone would be something some day. I thought I would never be anything more than a princess but I was wrong. This is the story of how I became more than just a princess.

My name is Medina and yes I am named after the city. My mother and father brought me up to be a very modest and Allah fearing woman. That being said, I still cannot explain what happened to me and why over the past month. One night I went to bed, after a long day of helping my mother take care of my younger siblings. It has been hard since my father was killed by suicide bombers and usually after a day like this, I do not remember my dreams or the images I see while I sleep. Somehow I am able to remember six days worth of dreams. They were so vivid and real feeling, maybe that is the reason I can.

But I am getting ahead of myself. Before I explain why I remember these dreams I have to explain something. I said my father was killed by insurgents or suicide bombers but that is just something that we tell my younger siblings. My mother says it is to help them understand that suicide bombers are horrible men and women. I know I should not say that but we do not agree with the motives and means that these men and women use. The truth is, we never found my father’s body. We do not know if he is dead or how he died. He just never came home. You would think a missing King would have search parties going on but with so much war, I understand.  So I have been helping my mother with my 8 siblings, as I am the oldest girl I have to. Now back to the dreams that changed my life forever.

The first night I was visited by a woman. I did not recognize the woman and do not think I had known her while she was alive. She came to me and said “ I know what happened to your father.” I looked at her in amazement. “My name is Adeela. I have come to help you find the reason your father died.” I looked at her some more. “So my father is dead?” That is all I could say. You would think I would ask about Allah or something but no that is all I could say. “King Achmad is indeed dead. He did not leave you Medina. He loved you more than you will ever know.”

I sat up and just stared, still trying to figure out what to ask. “How do I know you are real? How do I know you are not here to kill me, sent by the men who have killed my father?” She smiled “So you know men did it. That makes things a little easier.” “Well of course men did it. Who else would have?” As I was saying this I got out of bed and walked to the vision I had been seeing. She smiled and said “I will help you as much as I can tonight but it might take longer than that. My brothers and sister will come talk to you until you are able to figure it out. Hopefully it does not take all five of us but it might. Especially if you continue to think I am a figment of your imagination.” I look up at her and smiled. “I am sorry. This has never happened before. How long will you stay?” She smiled “One more hour.”

I heard my younger sister crying for me. “Abeda needs you.” I looked up at her. “Of course I know her name. I know all your brothers and sisters names. Go to her. I will be here.” I went to help my sister and brothers as fast as I could. I came back and Adeela was gone. I could not believe it. I guess my imagination was running wild so I went to bed. The next day I just went about my day of helping my mother and my brothers and sisters. I went to bed earlier than normal that night because I did not get much sleep with my crazy dream from the night before. Around the same time as the night before I heard singing. It was not words but I could hear singing. I sat up and there was a man in my room.

“Let me guess. You are Adeela’s brother?” He smiled. “Yes I am. My name is Adel. I am here to talk to you about your father’s death. Hopefully your brother and sisters will not interrupt you tonight.” I sat up, “They should not. What do you have to tell me?” “First I have a message from your father. Akeem needs to stay in school. You must make sure he does. He is the next King, after you of course. You will be Queen within 5 years.” I stared at Adel. “So you are a seer now?” He smiled “Well your father has plans for you and your siblings. Aladdin will be a great man and will serve as an Imam someday. Aleftina will be a great princess and will marry well. She will serve her king well. Would you like to hear more? Maybe about your future as a queen?”

I looked out the window. “I would like to know how my father died and how I can avenge it.”  He smiled, “That will come in time my queen. You will do your father and your name justice. Oh we have 30 minutes left. Would you like a clue as to your father’s death?” “How can I say no?” “Your father died while on his way to prayers. He was killed by two men he trusted. You must figure out which 2 killed him and tell one of us who you think it is. Your father believes that you are the only one who will be able to figure it out. Once you do, then you will be able to avenge his death.”

When I turned back he was gone. I went back to bed and started thinking about the men my father knew. I went throughout my day helping my siblings. My mother and I finally got a free moment and I ask my mother “Mama, who were Baba’s friends? I was thinking we should have a service for him at the mosque. Do you think that is a good idea?” She started crying. “I know you would love to mourn him Habiibtii. We must not give up hope until we have proof.” At that point, the children started waking up from their naps and I had to go back to my duties. I did not go to sleep that night. I waited up for the brother or sister to come.

“I see you stayed up this time.” I looked over and a man was sitting on my windowsill. “So I am Adil. You know why I am here. Should I tell you about the brothers and sisters that have not be discussed and then you can ask the questions that you have?” I looked over and he was sitting next to me. “I know you have questions. You must. I know I would.” “I would like to know about my brothers and sisters. I want to make sure that they will be okay in the future. I want to know when I take the throne that everyone will be okay.” He smiled, “You are very very worried about the world around you. Everyone will be fine. I promise you this. Okay so who have we not talked about? Oh yes Adiba. She will be a scholar. I know women are not suppose to be but she is bright and will go places. Adilia will become a queen eventually. Do not worry. She is not going to overthrow you. She will be of a different country and she will be honest with everyone.”

I look over. “My mother will not tell me about my Baba’s friends. How am I suppose to know who his friends are?” He sat beside me and smiled, “Medina you know what must be done. You have to look into your heart and think about what we have told you. You need to pray to Allah for guidance.” He looked over at the clock. “I know,” I said, “One hour a night. So how many more of you are there? 1?” Adal smiles, “2 more. I hope we can help. Your father knows you can do this.” Before I could say anything, he left.

In the morning, I helped my mother get everything done early. “Mama, I need to go walking around. Is that ok? Will you be ok here for one hour?” She looked at me and she smiled, “Oh Azizity! Of course you can! I am so sorry. I have kept you in this house for so long I almost forgot about the outside world. You must ask Adnan to go with you.” She yelled out the window for Adnan to go with me. Adnan is my uncle and must now walk with my mother or I, as our father is dead. Adnan comes over and smiles, “Errands Medina?” I smiled and explained to him I needed to get out of the house. We went walking and I asked if we could go to the mosque that my father prayed at. He took me to the mosque and I started to draw a picture. Men started to come out and two came to Adnan. I looked at the men.

After my uncle talked to these two strange men, I asked him who they were. “Oh those men were friends of your father. They believe he has abandoned the kingdom and we must find a new king. I should be next but I feel unworthy. So they believe that you are too young, as you are the oldest and a woman.” “What are their names?” “Azzam and Hamza.” I do not know how but I knew these were the men who killed my father. “We must go home.” I jumped off the wall and started walking to my house. Adnan started to ask questions, trying to figure out what is going on. “Do you trust me?” He shook his head “Yes and I will follow you wherever you lead my queen.” “Be ready in 2 days time. I have to plan our attack. I know who killed my father.”

That night I called for the ghosts or spirits to come. “My you are an eager one aren’t you?” I looked over. “I am Adila. I am here to see what you have found out and to tell you about the last of your brothers and sisters. Which should we start with first?” I look over. “My sisters and brothers please. I would like a little happiness before we talk about the horrid of my father’s death.” “Who is left? Oh yes Hanan and Hana. Hanan will be a great teacher someday. He has the patience for it. Hana will be...well...she will be happy in her life. She does not want much and she finds more than she has ever wanted.” I look over at her. “You forgot one.Hasanat? What will become of him?”

She looks down. “My sister, who will come tomorrow, knows of his fate. If I knew, I would tell you. What have you found out?” I breathe deep, “Azzam and Hamza. They killed my father.” “Very good. They did indeed in order to get the throne. They plan to storm the house in a day. You must prepare your family and friends for a fight. Would you like to know how your father died?” “I do not need to know how my father died. I know he was betrayed by the men he trusted. I will prepare my uncles and my brothers that I can to figh. What should I do with the rest of the family?” “I wish I could tell you, for the hour is up.” She leaves before finishing the sentence but I knew what she was saying.

I sleep as best as I can and get up early.  I call my uncles and brothers into the room. “Baba was killed. We must avenge his death. I will be fighting tomorrow.” My uncle tries to say something, “Ammu...please let me do what is right. I am the oldest. I must fight and help. I am the next in line for the throne. I am the one they want, I am the one who will fight them. I know I am not suppose to but I have no choice.” We go tell my brothers and sisters what is going on. “No Medina,” my mama cries, “you cannot fight. They will kill you.” “Mama, I will do what I can to prevent that. You must all leave tonight. They are coming in the morning.”

Everyone but my uncles and brothers leave. We all stay in the house of my father. I do not sleep so I was fully awake when the lost spirit comes. “I am Adaliah. The last of the ghosts you are to see.” I turn and face her. “I have everyone safe and ready to fight.” She smiles “You need one more person and you will be fine.” I hear a knock on the door and go to it. “I am Aamir. I am here to help. Where is Medina?” I come over to him and welcome him. “I have brought men to help. Where should we stay princess?” I tell him where to stay. “Thank you Aamir.” I go back to my room.

“He is the one you will be with. He will be your king.” I look at Adaliah. “So my sister Abeda needs me. Is that her future? What of Hasanat? What becomes of him?” She sighs. “Abeda needs you to live and Hasanat knows that. Hasanat will not live to see Mecca. Abbud will kill him tomorrow.” I look over at my brother sleeping. “Can I change it?” “Not unless Abbud is killed. I do not see that in the future.” I start to cry. “Everything will be fine Medina. You cannot change fate.” She leaves and I try to sleep. Hasanat is the first to wake and comes to me.

“Medina? Are you awake?” I start to stir. “Oh Hasa? Is everything ok? What is wrong?” “They are coming.” I get up and look 5 men. “We will fight to the death. Will we not Medi?” I look over at him. “Yes we will.” We wake all the men in our house and go outside. Abbud, Azzam and Hamza come over with 2 other men we have never seen before. I knew Abbud when I saw him. “So Medina did not run? We want her anyway! We will kill her! Her father abandoned us!” I stop him “How dare you? You killed my father and I have proof.” I grab his arm and rip a necklace off his neck. “This was my father’s! He never took it off. I gave it to him. The man who killed him would take it! How dare you call him a traitor!” He draws his sword and every one of my men draw theirs. “Do you want to die today?” I ask him.

He smiles and a fight starts. I fight Abbud. He looks at my brother the whole time. “Do you not want to be beat by a woman?” I ask slyly. “I will not be. I will kill you, then your brother.” I look into his eyes. “You will not kill me today.” I fight him. I push him down and stand on his chest. “Do you want to kill me?” He looks at his fellow fighters and see all but 2 on the ground. “Let me up Medina please. I will not kill you or your brother.” I let him up and call over a muttawa. “Take this man into custody and make sure that he never gets out. He is charged with killing the king.” I look over at the other two men. My uncles get Azzam and Hamza on the ground and I send more muttawa to get them. “Princess, should we kill them? They did kill your father.” I smile “No they must live with the fact that they tried to take over the kingdom and failed. They will never get out of jail alive.”

My uncles, cousins and brothers all look on in amazement as the men walk away alive. “So you will not kill them?” I look at Hasanat, “No they will live. Unless they try it again. I will be Queen and make sure they never get out.” We all walk to the house and find my mama there with the children. We rejoiced in the fact we all lived. That night I expected to go to bed and not have a dream.  I slept well and heard “So you change fate. How does it feel?” I look over and see a ghost. “I am Adeala and I am happy for you. Just remember to be merciful when you are queen and you will be fine. Oh and my brothers and sisters and I will be back to check on you.” I smiled and went back to sleep. I wake up to the sun shining and a normal day as more than a princess, I woke up a warrior,  a survivor, a sister, a caregiver, a fate changer and a future queen.