TW: Mentions/ talking about death

I made my way to the dorm. I knocked on the door and Mattheo opened it and let me in. Thomas was sitting on his bed, glaring in Mattheo’s direction and I was guessing they were fighting before I knocked on the door. “What’s going on?” I asked

“Nothing,” Thomas replied, still glaring at Mattheo. “I just won’t be able to be here for a while”

“Why?” 

“Father wants me to do some things, I will be busy until january” He glanced at me 

“When are you leaving?” 

“Today” 

Mattheo got up and left the room “Today?” I clarified 

He nodded his head “I will still be able to keep in touch but promise me something” 

“Yeah sure, what?” 

“Promise me you'll keep an eye on the boys, especially Mattheo” 

“I promise” 

“And promise me you will stay safe” 

“Yeah, of course. but… Thomas you're talking like I might never see you again” 

“You will see me again, don’t worry” 

“And what if I don’t?” 

“You will” He looked to the ground “But if I get hurt or taken, don’t save me, you’ll only get yourself killed” 

“Thomas” I sat next to him “Don’t think for a second that I would let you die. I could never live in a world without you. Nor could Mattheo. Without you, we’d fall into the abyss. Think of all the things that could happen, that would happen if you died. Mattheo would just be back to his old ways and I wouldn’t be able to stop him, no one would-” 

“Y/n” He cut me off “I wouldn’t be able to live without you, I know the fact of me dying is unimaginable, but you're going to have to deal with that fact. Everyone dies, everyone is always getting closer and closer to their deaths, it’s just a matter of how much time there is till that happens” 

 I looked down at my hands on my lap “I’m going to miss you” I looked up into his eyes 

“Me too” 

I leaned in and gave him a hug and he hugged me back. 

I wanted to stay here and hold on to him, never let him go, but I had to eventually. The hug felt like it lasted hours, but at the same time it felt like seconds. He pulled away “I have to go” 

A tear rolled down my cheek and he wiped it away. I nodded my head “Bye, I hope to see you again soon” my mouth tried to form a smile but it couldn’t. He hugged me again then disappeared, leaving me alone. 

_

November disappeared before my eyes and it was suddenly December. The air was getting colder, the trees had lost their leaves, and everything was darker. It was almost as if Thomas had taken the warmth and sun with him. All the happiness was gone, replaced with darkness. 

The evening sun was fading from the sky and shadows slowly seeped into the castle grounds, covering everything, hiding everything. The air was growing colder and the moon started to rise. 

I stood on the astronomy tower, alone, staring blankly in front of me. The wind blew around me, playing with my hair. I didn’t move, I stood completely still letting the darkness fill the sky. 

I don’t know how much time had passed but the cold air started to feel comfortable against my face and arms. 

A voice came from behind me “What are you doing here?” Mattheo asked, and after a minute without a response he came and stood next to me “Aren't you cold, why are you wearing short sleeves, it’s showing” He continued, glancing at the mark on my forearm

“No, I’m not cold, and no one comes up here anyway. Besides you and Theodore” 

He touched my arm and pulled his hand back. “You're freezing, are you sure you're not cold?” 

“Yes” 

“Are you drunk?” 

“No, do I look drunk” I moved my eyes to his 

“No” 

“Then why did you ask?”

“Because your not usually like this” 

“Like what?” 

“Nevermind” He turned away but I grabbed his wrist 

“Like what?” I asked my voice growing more annoyed 

“Careless” He thought a second more “Emotionless, numb to everything. Lately you’ve been distant. Does this have anything to do with Thomas or Theodore?” 

“I don’t know” I replied shrugging

“Y/n” He started “You know I’m here for you, whenever you need it, right?” 

“I know”

“Then tell me what’s wrong” 

“I don’t know, I have been feeling strange lately, it started a couple days after Thomas left, it’s like I can feel this darkness growing but it’s not me. If that makes any sense” 

“Where or who?” 

“I feel like” I paused, thinking on how to phrase this “it’s Thomas, something must have happened to him” 

“He’s just on a mission for father, he shouldn't be in that much trouble” 

“Yeah, a dangerous mission, one that he could possibly die on” 

“What?” 

“Did he not tell you?” 

“Tell me what?” 

“He told me that if he gets taken or hurt, that I shouldn’t help him because it would be too dangerous. And he told me to accept the fact that he might die” I looked towards the ground 

“He didn’t tell me that” 

I turned and looked up at him, his eyes had turned a dark crimson, darker than I had ever seen Thomas or my eyes turn. It suddenly felt like the temperature had gotten hotter and I stepped back from Mattheo “Are you ok?” I asked, as calm as possible

“Yeah why?” 

“I can feel heat, coming from you” I looked down at his hand “And your hands on fire”