Sirius was gone and he had taken everything with him. Lyra felt empty, hollow and the voice was taunting her non-stop, greedily taking up all the space to fill her head with painful thoughts and agonizing scenarios. What if she had been faster? What if she had been able to deflect the curse? Or what if it had hit her instead of Sirius? Honestly, she wouldn't have cared because losing Sirius was worse. It would've made no difference because without him nothing made sense anymore. Life had become meaningless.

Remus, despite nearly breaking beneath all that sorrow, tried his best to comfort her. He had promised her to stay by her side, no matter what happened and he was determined to keep that promise. Even if it was breaking him up inside. Even if his own heart felt like it had been torn to pieces. He still held Lyra every time when a panic attack took over, he still whispered soothing words after every nightmare. It was pure agony, especially the first few weeks when Lyra had refused to eat or sleep.

Molly had done her absolute best but only after Remus had resorted to begging Lyra had slowly started to ladle the soup he had brought up from the kitchen. And after that they had curled up on the bed, Lyra wrapped up in one of Sirius' shirts, quiet sobbing muffled by the pillows. Grief was a funny thing, one might think it would take something from you, but instead, it gave you so much you had never asked for. Manely loads and loads of thoughts no one should have to keep inside their head.

"Why are we still fighting?", Lyra had asked one night as they lay awake, their legs entangled, Remus' fingers buried in her curls. "Because Harry still needs us.", he answered because it was the only thing that kept her going. Because it was the only thing that still mattered. "And if we fail?", Lyra whispered, hiding her face in Remus' sweater. "We won't, not this time.", he replied. Conversations like this had become their daily routine, almost like a mantra. Lyra would have doubts, her beliefs would start to crumble and Remus was there to catch her. Every single time. Just like he had promised.

And so the days went on and on, weeks became months until...

"He's dead, isn't he?" Lyra was looking out of the window, her back turned towards the open door of their bedroom. Remus, who had run up the stairs, sighed and nodded. Lyra pressed her lips together and closed her eyes for a moment. "Who did it? Draco?" "No, Snape." Remus' voice sounded strangely vapid. A dry laugh escaped Lyra's mouth. "Of course it was him..." She turned around. "How's Harry? Did you talk to him?" Remus closed the door and sat down on the bed. "No, not yet. There are too many things happening right now and...I don't think we have time to mourn."

"I'm not mourning, not because of Dumbledore. I know Harry trusted him but I didn't. Not after what he did." Lyra dug her fingers into her arms which were wrapped around her upper body. She sometimes did that to prevent things from falling apart. "I'm not saying you have to be sad, Lyra. I'm saying that his death won't stop the war.", Remus explained as he held up his hand, reaching out to her. Lyra hesitated and then let him pull her onto the bed. "It doesn't matter who lives or dies. In the end...we're all just tiny pieces in this game."

"You're wrong.", Remus said but not in an angry tone. "It does matter, at least one life matters. And we have to keep him safe as long as we can. We have to be strong for him." Lyra leaned back, letting herself drop against Remus' chest. "I know you're right but...I'm so tired. I don't wanna fight anymore." Remus fondled her hands, bringing them up to his lips and placing a faint kiss on her knuckles. "Me too. And I promise when this is over...I'll take you to Cornwall." Lyra smiled and nuzzled deeper into Remus' touch. Old books and chocolate, a scent she would forever associate with him. Because to her, it smelled like home.

***

May 2nd, 1998

The castle was on fire. Debris covered the courtyard, the air was streaked with dust and innumerable screams. In the tumult of the battle, colored lights flashed through the night, spells and curses and Lyra had lost sight of Remus almost an hour ago. Fear was constantly trying to paralyze her body but she fought against it, trying to remain as calm as possible. Harry was off to search the diadem, Ron and Hermione had gone with him so she tried not to worry too much about him.

A heavy stone pillar right next to Lyra shattered into a thousand pieces, the sharp remains scratching up her face. She ran around the next corner into the corridor beyond, trying to shield herself. There were explosions everywhere, the heat of the raging fires pressing in through every crack in the walls. Never, not in a million years Lyra would've thought that her return to Hogwarts would be like this. An image suddenly flashed before her eyes, a weak memory of James and Sirius running from Filch, laughing.

"Help!" Lyra turned around, there was a young boy cornered by two Death Eaters, pressed against the banisters. Blonde ruffled hair, dirty face, maybe 15 or 16. She didn't falter and raised her wand. "Flipendo!" And two bodies were hauled over the banisters, hopefully breaking a bone or two as they landed on the stairs beneath. "Thank you...", the boy breathed, staring at her. "Get down to the dungeons, it's safer there.", Lyra said and the boy quickly nodded.

Watching him run away Lyra brushed back her messy curls. She had to find Remus, now. A hurried look around told her that she was near the left corridor on the seventh floor, close to the room of requirement. For Merlin's sake, Remus could be everywhere. If only she had the map, if only... Out of nowhere, a giant double door burst open, a wall of demonic fire nearly swallowing what was trying to escape. Lyra quickly put up a protective barrier and realized that it was Harry, scuttling on the ground.

Something slid over the flagstones and Harry shouted almost panicked: "Destroy it!" Without thinking, Lyra reached out and grabbed a delicate silver diadem adorned with a blue sapphire. Nice to look at, but just holding it was enough for Lyra to feel the black magic that was flowing through it. A Horcrux, no doubt, and following Harry's call, Lyra lifted the protective spell and threw the diadem into the fire. Rumbling and with a noise that sounded almost like a scream, a tremor shook the corridor as the flames consumed the piece of Voldemort's soul and the doors to the room of requirement closed with a dull thump.

Lyra felt the unrestrained heat slowly dissipate and looked down at Harry and his friends. He had a bleeding wound near his scar and she immediately knelt down, laying a hand on his shoulder. "Are you okay?", she asked and Harry looked at her, green eyes scurrying around before they found her. Relief made his body relax for a second and he leaned towards Lyra, glad that she was with him. "Yeah, I'm okay.", he said and Lyra did her best to give him a smile. "Good, keep going. We have your back.", she promised, briefly stroking his hair.

Harry nodded and they all got up. The battle didn't stop because they needed a break and as soon as Harry and the others were out of sight, Lyra continued her search for Remus. Maybe it was a pointless venture but as Lyra tried to make her way through the castle she attempted to save as many lives as possible, always thinking about Harry, hoping that he was as safe as he could be right now. She was close to the Great Hall when a magically amplified voice started meandering through the hallways, seeping into her head.

Although she had never heard that voice before Lyra knew who it belonged to and she shut her eyes, trying not to listen. Her mind tried to banish Voldemort's words as she stumbled through the open doors. There were silent cries, bodies placed wherever they had room. Lyra was about to just sit down where she was standing when a strong hand grabbed her wrist. It was Kingsley, his face was covered in dirt and a bruise was forming on his cheek. He looked terrible.

"I'm sorry.", he said and stepped aside. Lyra frowned, looking at him confused but he only lowered his head, and as Lyra followed his line of sight her body went numb. Someone caught her as her legs gave way but she didn't care. Everything surrounding her faded into the distance, time stopped and she wanted to scream but her throat was too tight and her mouth was dry. Not even her eyes wanted to wet and Lyra felt as if she was falling down an endless dark shaft.

Remus was lying on a dirty stretcher, dried blood was sticking to his nose and lips and a few brown curls eclipsed his closed eyes. Lyra's body started to tremble, something inside her wanted to break out. She pushed away from the arms which were holding her, dragged herself across the floor towards Remus. As if in a trance, she grabbed his pale hand, clung to it as if she could keep him a bit longer like that. Stopping him from getting pulled away to a place where she couldn't follow him.

And then Harry was there, right next to her, his hand on top of her and Remus' entangled fingers and she finally let out a harrowing scream, collapsing once more. Lyra always knew that she wouldn't be able to take another loss. She always knew that another calamity would destroy her beyond repair. Her heart could only take so much and now there was nothing left, just a bleeding hole in her chest.

"I'm here, Lyra. I'm here and I'm not gonna leave you.", Harry whispered, voice heavy with tears. But that was a lie as only an hour later he left to sacrifice his own life, ignoring the desperate pleading of Lyra. "Please, don't do this. There has to be another way.", she said for what felt like the hundredth time. "There is no other way and you know that.", Harry replied calmly. "No, I won't let you do this. I'm not going to lose you. I swore that I would protect you, I promised it to your parents. I can't...", Lyra's voice broke. There wasn't any strength left that she could use to make Harry stay.

"And you did, you did protect me." Harry hugged her, allowing himself to be a little boy one last time. A boy who just wanted a family. "And now I'm gonna protect you." He let go of her, avoiding looking her in the eyes as he knew that it could've made him want to stay. She was the only thing left of a family he had never known and he owed it to Sirius and Remus to keep her safe. Even if he silently wished she would come with him as he faced death on his own.

Lyra never understood how she managed not to break down when at dawn Hagrid carried Harry in his arms, a gruesome parallel of when he had been just a baby. But she didn't, maybe it was just the pure shock that kept her standing, the absolutely overwhelming nature of everything that had happened. It was too much for her to be able to get a hold but none of that mattered as Harry stirred alive. She drew her wand, ready to end this once and for all.

Lyra would have liked to say that only Harry and the desire to protect him gave her strength. But the real reason for that sudden powerful drive was the need for revenge. Kingsley had told her that the last time he had seen Remus he had been fighting with Antonin Dolohov. The dark-skinned wizard had been reserved of saying out loud what Lyra had understood immediately. Dolohov was responsible for Remus' death and she didn't care anymore if it would make her a bad person or not. She would find Dolohov and kill him.

And as fate would have it, it didn't take long before she spotted him, throwing curses at a pair of students. She shortly thought of just using the killing curse but that would've been painless and Dolohov didn't deserve mercy. With a growl emanating from deep within her chest Lyra transformed into the lynx, hauling at the dark wizard, pinning him to the ground with her paws. Satisfaction spread through her body when she saw the horror in Dolohov's face and then her sharp teeth sank deep into his flesh, tearing him apart.

It was easy, his muscles were as soft as butter and no match for her fangs. Blood flooded down her throat but she ignored the taste. This wasn't about feeding, this was about acting on instincts and fulfilling the gloomy desire that had been growing inside her since Sirius' death.

"Such a temper. I should've turned you instead of that pathetic little boy." Lyra let go of Dolohov's corpse, returning to her human form and facing the brawny man, more beast than anything else. She knew his face. It was Fenrir Greyback, the werewolf who had bitten Remus when he was just a child. The lynx reared up, wanting to take the monster down but Lyra raised her wand instead. "Won't you use your beautiful fangs, little cat?", Greyback taunted, spreading his arms.

"They're wasted on you.", Lyra hissed, rage lathering up, fueling her magic. "What a shame.", Greyback sighed, then grinned and Lyra lost it. "Confringo!" A blast of fire stopped Greyback from leaping at her but it didn't stop him in his pursuit at all. If anything it made him angrier. "Depulso!", Lyra shouted and even though it did knock the werewolf back a bit she soon found herself trapped against a destroyed archway. "Is that all you've got, little witch?", Greyback roared, a maniacally laugh erupting from his throat.

Lyra gritted her teeth. In the back of her mind, she knew what curse would put an end to this, and yes, she had killed Dolohov but for some reason, it would feel different using that one specific curse. And then, before she could even point her wand at Greyback again, claws dug deep into her arms, she got lifted off her feet and her back hit the wall. A nasty, cracking sound echoed through her body, and breathing suddenly became very hard.

Then teeth buried themselves into her skin, blood pooling around her, and Lyra's head started spinning, her eyes fluttering close. It was not the pain that made her surrender but something else and before she could try and concentrate, heavy but warm darkness wreathed her, tightly holding her with the promise of peace and Lyra didn't have the strength to hold on, losing consciousness just as Bill Weasley ripped Greyback away from her.

***

May 3rd, 1998

The blanket felt cold but Harry was there, holding her hand. She had called him James once already but he didn't mind. Her thoughts were getting slower, her mind felt murky, just as if she was drifting off to sleep. The pain was numb, maybe because she slowly lost her sense, maybe because of the meds she had been given by the healers at St. Mungos. "You'll still be with me, right?", Harry suddenly asked and Lyra blinked. She tried to focus and squeezed Harry's hand. He was just a boy after all...

"We will be with you, Harry. All of us. Always. You know we will never truly leave you.", she whispered and Harry nodded. He was afraid, she could tell by the look in his eyes. Lily's eyes...

"Shhh...", she soothed, even though he hadn't said anything. "You're not alone. You're safe now and you're loved." Harry smiled, tried to be strong for her because she had been always strong for him. Even when he couldn't remember anything before the Dursleys. Lyra squeezed his hand again. "You were so little when I first held you...", she mumbled, tripping over her own words. Harry felt his eyes burning up with tears. He wasn't ready to lose her, not yet. She was the last thread connecting him with his past, his parents. She kept them alive while she was breathing.

"And James and Lily were so happy, they loved you so much...", Lyra said, closing her eyes. It was too bright and she felt sleepy. She knew she was dying but she wasn't afraid, she was prepared, ready to see her friends again. "It's okay, you can go now...", Harry said softly, stroking over the back of her hand with his thumb. Lyra smiled weakly. "I know, I know you'll be okay..." After that Harry replied but she couldn't hear him. Lyra forgot where she was, she forgot Harry, she lost reality, it was gliding through her fingers and suddenly she found herself in the Gryffindor common room.

"Took you a while.", someone said and Lyra's heart winced in pain and pure delight. "James...", she breathed and the bespectacled boy grinned. Lyra flung herself into his arms and two other bodies suddenly pressed against her back. Lyra knew in an instant. "Lily..." "Hey Lyra, we've been waiting.", Lily smiled, smelling of apples and the first day of spring. "I know...I know you were waiting.", Lyra replied, her voice only a whisper. It felt so good to have them back.

"Oi, don't forget about me.", Sirius practically whined, pulling Lyra onto his lap with no effort whatsoever. "Calm down Pads, you've got me for the rest of eternity.", Lyra laughed but she had to admit that the feeling of his chest pressing against her back was...well it felt like home. "Come on, let her breathe.", another familiar voice soothed and Lyra looked up to see Remus standing in front of her. That was enough to push her over the edge and tears started streaming down her face. "Oh god, I've missed you all so much..."

Remus smiled and knelt down before her, taking her hand. "No more goodbyes from now on, I promise." Lyra nodded as Sirius placed his chin on her shoulder. "And no more tears darling, eh?" Lyra quickly wiped under her eyes. "I'm trying Pads." "It's okay, you're with us now, Smirks.", James said, smiling reassuringly. "Don't you ever leave me again, okay?" Lyra looked at her friends, the people she loved most in the whole world.

"Never, we swear.", Sirius promised. "We solemnly swear.", Remus added and winked. Lyra couldn't remember the last time she had seen Remus wink but it made her heart twitch with happiness. And she felt loved and at home and knew she would never be alone again.