Muggles, Muggles, Muggles. Interesting folk. As I'm sure you've heard a thousand times, they can't do magic. Unless they have a kid with magical abilities, they don't even know about our world. I'm sure that seems dreadfully boring, life with no magic, no Hogwarts, no dragons. From someone with firsthand experience in the Muggle world, let me tell you, it is anything but. Have you ever lived in a Muggle community? News spreads faster than your mom can send you a Howler. Everything is just gossip. It's like Mean Girls but with full-grown adults. They even have apps on their phones JUST for gossiping. One of these apps has everyone in the town in one place. I never get into it, but man, do I love reading the gold these Muggles post. Everyone is very passive-aggressive and extremely judgemental. But you can't be rude, never can you be rude. You can only express your thoughts as "friendly" comments.

Here's one example, courtesy of my neighbor Sherri: "I love how we all keep our neighborhood clean. We all tend to our lawns, never litter, and pick up our dog's ----." (Watch the language Sherri, there are kids here.) Sherri posted this after watching someone NOT pick up after their dog. Almost every single person replied saying things like, "Oh yeah it'd be a shame if someone didn't contribute to the effort we all put into keeping the place look nice." Then, one person would say, "Maybe they don't notice or don't have the time." Uh oh. ALL of the middle-aged wives and Karen's band together, personally attacking this poor guy who's just trying to defend the initial 'criminal.' Dog-poop-neglecter and new-to-the-neighborhood just became everyone's worst enemy.

What I love about this app along with the pure DRAMA, is when you go onto these cynical, lonely, on-their-second-husband woman's profiles, all you see is a fake life. They post pictures of their kids, inspiring quotes, and "DIY life hacks." Their profile picture is a filtered selfie and their hobbies include being a stay-at-home mom who regrets getting married so young. Everyone is so similar, and there are at least three people who spell their name "Carin." What I love about my parents is that they're not like that. They're their own people. Of course, this means they're the target of half of the slander from the others. But they just show me the ridiculous things people are saying about them and laugh.