Daily Prophet (Issue 1)

written by Aly Potter

Last Updated

05/31/21

Chapters

5

Reads

625

WEASLEYS’ WIZARD WHEEZES PIXIE DUST

Chapter 3
A new product will launch at Weasleys’ Wizard Wheezes this week, and it is destined to fly off the shelves!

The Magical Community has been abuzz with anticipation over this new release! The brains behind Weasleys’ Wizard Wheezes has kept everyone on their toes with their most recent marketing campaign. Their spokesperson Kevin Kettering has been seen passing out flyers all over Diagon Alley and has even gone on several wizarding wireless broadcasts to shine a bright light on this new product and Weasleys’ Wizard Wheezes, the most popular joke shoppe in our Magical Community.

“It hasn’t been said exactly when the shelves will be stocked. You’ll just have to come by and see for yourselves if the Weasleys decided to put it out yet,”

said Kettering on Hogwarts Happenings weekly broadcast this past Sunday. This sparked so much attention that there have been large queues of witches and wizards outside the store on a daily basis. However, we here at The Daily Prophet are excited to announce that the wait is over and this amazing new product will officially launch this Saturday. Don’t forget to tune in as we provide an inside scoop on all the details that everyone has been hungry for!

The newest addition to Weasleys’ Wizard Wheezes is Pixie Dust. Seemingly boring just by the name, this product is anything but! Pixie Dust enables the user to levitate and is available in varying strengths that are differentiated by colors for their users. Bronze Pixie Powder is recommended for users under 80lbs, Silver is recommended for users under 160 pounds and anyone over 160lbs should use Gold Pixie Dust.

The product’s strength has been made easily identifiable on its packaging as well as the product themselves with the boxes being the same color as the powder. Each box boasts smiling, laughing witches and wizards levitating off the ground, while some even appear to be flying!

We had the chance to briefly sit down with Ron Weasley to discuss the new product, who promised that it would be a definite winner for any witch or wizard receiving it.

“The idea actually came from my son, Hugo.” Mr. Weasley said with a nervous laugh. “We were at family dinner one day and we were talking about flying lessons. He mentioned in a rather impatient manner that he wanted to fly on his own. George and I looked at each other and it was like we both just knew that was going to be our next big project.”

He went on to explain that after years and years of product development and testing they finally perfected the formulas and decided it was time to launch before summer began. This highly anticipated product is all that it was promised to be and more.

Brand spokesperson Kevin Ketteridge has been on multiple wizarding wireless broadcasts as of late getting the public ready for this products release. Many of you heard the spots but for those of you who didn’t, Ketteridge gave little to no information on the actual product. Interestingly enough this strange marketing tactic has actually proven successful considering the stores overcrowded customer base since he first let the product release date slip.

The Daily Prophet’s Staff attended the product launch party with special press access and got to get an inside peek at how Weasley’s Wizard Wheezes prepares for the pandemonium that will come along with the momentous day. Large displays were prominently displayed on the store floor of Weasleys’ Wizard Wheezes that included warnings not to test the products on the shelves. While the displays heed cautionary use, we have been told that come Saturday morning anyone in the store will likely witness more than their fair share of levitating customers while in the shoppe.

George Weasley laughed off the possible danger of such in house product testing while saying that the effects of the Pixie Dust will be a dead giveaway, making it easy for for the members of the Weasley’s Wizard Wheezes staff to identify rogue customers.

“It will be much easier to spot the sneaks than when kids were using Peruvian Instant Darkness Powder!”

Our staff got a few samples of Pixie Dust and we can honestly say that it is going to be a massive success for Weasleys’ Wizard Wheezes! Our office was full of levitating staff members all afternoon and no one wanted to stop the fun to continue working.

We here at The Prophet are excited to get some more Pixie Dust and hope to see our readers at the official product launch this Saturday at the famous joke shop in Diagon Alley.

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