Dear Diary,

3 words revolved around in my head all day, in fact for the past few days, "It's not time". 

It's been a day of celebration around here in Hogwarts. Dearest August had been promoted to Deputy Headmaster of the school. I'm so so proud of him and I'm so sure he will bring Hogwarts to greater heights. I brought a whole basket of goodies to his office only to see a queue outside his door with students walking in one by one to congratulate him. I guess I'll just have to wait another day to congratulate him. This man is sure one popular person in the school. 

On the other hand, it still scares me a little that just a week ago, Naya was still the Deputy Headmistress. Suddenly, she's not. Well, a good news would be that she's no longer just Naya Nivera but instead Naya Nivera-Darkstorm. I'm so happy for the two of them. Watching them gaze into each others' eyes during staff dinners really makes one jealous. If only I had someone who has eyes for me like how Henrick has for Naya. 

Just the other day, I walked into the Professor Lounge and saw Elizabeth and a man sitting on the sofa. It was a little awkward but thankfully they didn't see me. The man's back was facing the door as they chatted. He was twirling her hair around his fingers and she giggled to his every joke. Wow, I've never once seen her like this before. She's always been the sweet girl but to giggle and chuckle - that's a first. 

For the first time in a week, I've decided to leave the school grounds and travel to Diagon Alley in search of something sweet. I was stopped by the sweet smell from the bakery and it made me backtrack my steps once more. The colourful pieces of egg white and flavoured goo sent excited shivers down my spine. Immediately, I went into the store and bought 5 of each flavour. It choked up to about 150 macarons as they had 30 flavours. Excited to share them with the rest, I realised I came back to an empty hallway. So, I went around showering pupils with some of these tiny delights. 

I smiled as the pupils thanked me for the macarons. Molina Jame even screamed for the Vanilla ones, and so I gave her all 5 pieces of that flavour. Heather D took the Limoncello ones and walked away happily after thanking me. 

At times like this, I can't help but tell myself "Autumn, it's not time".

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Well, today was kind of emotional. 

I felt like that was what I needed. I've heard and read what I've needed to hear and see. I don't know how to explain how I feel right now but it's a sense of loss. 

My heart sank.

Deep deep down.

It hurts.