The Attack of Babybel
written by Parvati Riddle
When Babybel cheese Attack Hogwarts, what will Miranda Khan, Ali Potter, Matt Carrow, Ocean Nevada, Parvati Riddle, Kal Zor-El, Demon Riddle, Alex Riddle, Esther Le' Strange, Eli Le'Strange, Susannah Zor-El, Jake Wedinson, Nik Thomas, Storm Wolfpaw, and the rest of Hogwarts do? Will they surrender and let the Babybel take Hogwarts, or will they fight?
Last Updated
05/31/21
Chapters
1
Reads
617
The Attack of Babybel
Chapter 1
Scene 1: (Susannah Zor-El is lying asleep in bed, snoring loudly, Miranda Khan rushes into the room and shouts…)
Miranda: SUSANNAH! WAKE UP!
Susannah: [snorts] Wuh? Huh? It’s only 6:45!
Miranda: PROFESSOR GILWAK SAID HE WANTED TO MEET EARLY TODAY!!!
Susannah: Ha, oh yeah… Oh… OH NO! GAAAAAH!
FADE OUT
FADE IN
Scene 2: SETTING: Potions classroom, students scattered around the room chatting, etc, Professor Gilwak standing at front next to a red boat, looking at his watch with an angry expression on his face.
Miranda (gasping): We’re here!
(Classmates pointing and laughing.)
Professor Gilwak (angrily): Everyone have a seat!
(Everyone surrounds the tables and looks up at Professor Gilwak…)
Professor Gilwak: Okie Dokie, today we’ll be making “iron stomach potion”,
(Professor Gilwak [PG] moves a crate of books to the front of the room)
Susannah: I like iron.
Miranda: Me too.
Professor Gilwak: Ok grab your ingredients guys! Then after pour them into this canoe!
(Everyone rushes to grab their ingredients.)
Miranda: Out of the way! Me first! I have scissors and I'm not afraid to use them!
(Everyone’s eyes grow scared and run out of the way.)
Miranda: Here Susannah!
(Miranda hands Susannah one of the books and leads her to grab her ingredients.)
Susannah: Thank you!
(Susannah and Miranda rush to look at their books and measure their ingredients.)
(FLASH TO: Parvati Riddle and Esther LeStrange)
Parvati: Iron stomach potions are so easy.
Esther: They’re so easy a first year could easily brew it up.
Parvati: I love spending time with you Es.
Esther: Me too.
Professor Gilwak: Are you ready?
Most of the class: Yes!
Jake Wedison: No.
Professor Gilwak (angrily): HURRY YOU FOOL!
(Jake quickly pours his ingredients…)
Jake: There. Done. Is Ya happy?
Professor Gilwak: Yes.
FILM STOP
(WW[Willy Wizard] spills one extra ingredient and the potion bubbles, and explodes loudly....)
Professor Gilwak: WhO meSSeD uP!?
Willy Wizard: U hee hee! Oops!
Professor Gilwak: UgHHhhHhH
WW: Sorry!!! Hee hee!
(Ava Bones, Parvati, and Miranda come to Willy)
Ava: You messed up my potion!
Miranda (nervously, quietly): We can fix it...
Parvati: You messed up my HAIRRRRRR!!!! Oh, and you stained my boots. I spent HOURS washing the blood off them!
(The two beat WW up)
Willy: That hurt!
Parvati: Deal with it.
Rolanda: YOU JERKY FACE JERKS!!! WHY WOULD YOU BEAT UP THE CUTIE BOY!?!?!?
(She smiles at Willy, and he smiles back)
Professor Gilwak: STOP THE VIOLENCE!!!!!!!
Parvati: But I LOVE violence!!
Ali: Parvati calm your shots!
Professor Gilwak: And I love cheese but it makes me gassy for days! Looks like we both can’t get what we want.
Matt Storm: UNNECESSARY!!
Parvati: Matt! Stop saying unnecessary! It's annoying!
Matt: But Senorita! I can't stop! It's in my blood!
Parvati: Awwwww…. I love it when you call me senorita!
Esther: UGH.
(Miranda pours another ingredient in the potion and it calms and is fixed.)
Miranda: THERE.
END MOMENT
FLASH TO: (a screen that says “A WHILE LATER”)
(A friend of the group, Storm Wolfpaw, comes crashing through the door, panting.)
Storm: Am I late?
Professor Gilwak: About an hour, 5 minutes and 7 seconds late, yes.
Storm: An hour?
Professor Gilwak: We were meeting early today, Ms. Wolfpaw.
Storm: Sorry.
Professor Gilwak: I shall let it pass today.
[Professor Gilwak struts away]
FLASH TO:
Professor Gilwak (close up[under his breath]): What you will face today will be punishment enough…
FADE OUT
Scene 3:
(SETTING: Corridors)
PA system: It’s a beautiful day! Let’s eat our lunch outside!
(The gang shrugs)
Eli LeStrange: It IS a nice day...
Jake: Yep
Rolanda Creevy: IT’S ONLY NICE IF YOU’RE NICE TO ME FOR ONCE!!!!!!!!
Kal Zor-El: No offense Rolanda, but you’re weird.
Rolanda: AH, THANK YOU, THE JERKIEST OF JERKY FACE JERKS!
Kal: Get OVER it Rolanda, that was years ago!!
Rolanda: DON’T CARE! TA-TA JERKY FACE JERKS!
FADE OUT
Scene 4: (SETTING: Outside, by Hagrid’s hut.)
Hagrid (happily) Great to see yer all!
Parvati: Hey Hagrid!
(Kal hugs Hagrid)
Hagrid: Ello to yeh to Kal!
Jake: Hail to Hagrid!
Esther: We missed you Hagrid.
Hagrid: Hey Ali, say ello to yer dad fer me, I miss him.
Ali: Okay! I will when I visit next month! (Under her breath) Uhg.
(Fire, Miranda’s dragon comes swooping in)
Hagrid and Miranda (together loudly): Fire!
FILM STOP
FLASH TO:
Kal: Hm, I wonder where Sunny is... Speaking of Sunny-
Hagrid: Yep! Yer Sunny his daily honey delivery!
(Hagrid hands Kal a small jar of honey)
Kal: Good!
(Sunny the bear comes crawling to the group)
Sunny: Hewo Kaww!
Kal: Hiya Sunny!!
Esther: o.m.GGGGGG. HE’S SO CUTEEEE!!!! CAN I HOLD HIM!?
Kal: Sunny?
Sunny: Yuwp!
Esther: SQUEEEEEEE!
(Esther picks up Sunny)
Esther: HE’S SO FLUFFYYYYYYYY!!!!
Parvati: Since when do you like bears?
Esther: Since NOW!
FADE OUT
SCENE 5: (SETTING: Hogwarts grounds, Esther’s flashback)
(Eli, Esther, and Parvati are walking together on Hogwarts grounds)
Eli: What a beautiful day!
Parvati: I know right!
Esther: Nothing’ can ruin it…
(A bear walks up)
Parvati: Awww!
(The bear tackles Esther)
Esther: SRIRACHA! AHHHH HELP MEEEE!!
PARVATI: OH MY FRITTATA!!
(Eli punches the bear)
Eli: Oops! Wrong move
(Parvati uses her electricity powers to shoot the bear, the bear struts off)
Esther: *gasps for breath* it. was. terrible
FADE OUT
(SCENE 6: Night Time)
(Kal, Ocean, Parvati, and Matt are laying in a field, Stargazing)
Kal: The stars are really pretty
Matt: Just like you, Parvati
Parvati: Oh, don’t flatter me... Actually... please do!
Matt: Oh, I have a billion compliments I could give you
Parvati: Hee hee.
Ocean: Can you two ever not act lovey-dovey?
Parvati: No. We can’t
Kal: Hey, what’s that in the sky..?
Matt: Hmm?
Ocean: It’s a weird green glow...
(The four hear a crash off in the distance)
Parvati: Let’s check it out
FADE OUT
SCENE 7:
(The four teleport to the unknown area on Hogwarts Grounds)
Kal: It looks like a... Ship...
(They walked closer, to be greeted by four Babeybel cheese rounds)
???: We are Babeybel... AND WE COME TO DESTROY!!!!
Ocean: This will be EASY!
FILM STOP
Kal, Parvati, Matt, and Ocean: AVADA KEDAVRA!!!
(A green light flies to the Babeybels)
Kal: It didn’t work!!
?????: Ha! Your spells are no match for us CHEESE!
??: Silly wizards! My name is Ella Mozzarella, and you can’t hurt us!
Ocean: How creative...
????: I’m Cole Colby Jack! And you are no match!
?????: I’m Peter Pepper Jack, but we don’t matter. You will NOT defeat our master!
Parvati: And who exactly is that?
???: Mwahahaha!! It is I.. Chester Cheddar!!!!!!!!!!
(Chester uses a spell to summon Matt over to him)
Ella: Give up Hogwarts.. Or he is turned to milk!
Parvati: MATT!!!!!!!
Matt: Don’t... Do.. it!
Parvati: I HAVE TO!!! You can have Hogwarts!!
Peter: You stupid girl! Milkify!
(Matt turns to milk and drips onto the roof forming a small puddle.)
Parvati: Wait... WHAT!? MATT!
(Parvati falls to her knees.)
Parvati: No.
Esther: It’s ok Parvati.
Storm: I saw it coming.
Eli: Storm!
(Eli slaps Storm’s arm.)
Storm: Ow.
Parvati: No. This isn’t happening.
(Demon Riddle, Parvati’s brother, runs to Matt, who is now in milk form, to collect the milk.)
Alex Riddle: Well, I’ll work with Eli to find a spell to get him back.
Parvati: O-ok. In the meantime, I’ll focus on murdering all of these cheese dude alien things.
(Parvati’s expression turns steel hard. She takes out her wand.)
Parvati: Accio Death 2000!
(Parvati’s broom comes soaring out of nowhere.)
Parvati: Time to show them who’s boss.
FILM STOP
FLASH TO:
Esther: Me, Demon, and everyone else who doesn’t want to go with Alex and Eli will come with you.
Ocean: I’ll go.
Miranda: Same.
Susannah: I’ll stay here.
Kal: If sis is staying, I am too.
Miranda: Take your wand, and stay sharp guys.
Susannah: You too.
Cole: You’re not going ANYWHERE!!! MILKIFY!!!
(Ocean turns into milk while screaming)
Kal: OCEAN!!!!!
Miranda: We will deal with it later! We have to go!
(They leave, leaving the attack group alone.)
FILM STOP
FLASH TO:
Parvati: Let’s move ou-
Ali Potter: Let me and Nik come too Parvati.
Parvati: Ali! You’re ok!
Ali: Nothing a little kicking can beat.
Nik Thomas: Hey, Esther.
Esther (smirking): Hey Nik.
(Jake appears)
Jake: Hey guys! Hey Eli…
Eli: Ummm... H--hi...
Ella: Oooh! More victims!! MILKIFY!!
(Ali, dodges, but Nik and Jake turn to milk)
Parvati: NIK!!!
Eli: JAKE!!!
Ali: We have to continue!!
Everyone, pose Parvati: Accio Broom!
(Everyone’s broom comes soaring into their hands.)
Parvati: Let's go!
(Everyone flies into the air to the UFO)
Storm: Hey Cheesies!
Cole Colby Jack: Storm
Peter Pepper Jack: Wolfpaw
Kal: Return Parvati’s boyfriend to his original shape!
Ali: Or you’ll meet a very Cheesy end!
Demon: What?
Ali: I’m trying to make cool remarks like superheroes do.
Kal: Super..heroes?
Ali: Yeah like Wonder Woman, and Supergirl
Parvati:?
Ali: You need to spend a little more time with Miranda.
Demon: Whatever… Let’s get on with it!
FILM STOP
FLASH TO:
Kal: Ella Mozzarella, You’re about to be fried Mozzarella!
Ella: Huh?
Kal: Lacarnum Inflamari!
Ella: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
(Ella Mozzarella burns to a crisp.)
(Flash picture of fried mozzarella)
Professor M. McGonagall: Babybel! Leave us to rest! Return my students!
Cole Colby Jack: Not a chance in Rao!
Parvati: May Rao curse you!
McGonagall: What’s Rao?
Parvati: Kinda like the sun god...
McGonagall: Ohhhhk…
FILM STOP
SCENE 8: (More combat between human and cheese. Continue fight until only Chester remains…)
Parvati: I’m out of energy! What do we do?!
Ali: HELP!
FADE OUT
SCENE 9:
Susannah: I know what I have to do!
Kal: I’m thinking what you’re thinking.
(Susannah and Kal run off into Hogwarts…)
FADE OUT
FADE TO: (Susannah and Kal in the potions classroom where the boat of potion lies.)
Susannah: Aha!
(Susannah jumps into the boat of potion and begins to drink.)
Susannah: *chugging noises*
Kal: I brought a paper straw!
…
Susannah: WOOHOO! LET’S DO THIS!
FADE OUT
FADE TO:
SCENE 10: (SETTING: Back on the roof.)
(Susannah and Kal run onto the scene and Susannah yells…)
Susannah: I don’t know how old you are Mr. Cheddar dude, but hopefully you’re at least a properly aged cheese!
(They run in slow motion at Chester Cheddar…)
Parvati: Why are you running so slow?
Susannah: It’s cool…
Storm: You’re remarks are cool, not that...
Chester: No.. No..! NOOOOOOOOOOO!
(Susannah eats Chester)
Susannah: Delicious!
Eli: Hooolp!
(Eli pukes)
Eli: But.. wait... What about Matt!? And Jake, Ocean, and Nik!?
Parvati: Oh no.. oh no no no...
(Parvati, Eli and Kal’s eyes water when they look at the jug containing them. The others return on Miranda’s dragon)
Ali: Parvati? What’s wro-
(She sees Parvati point towards the milk jug)
Esther: Oh no... P-Parvati...
Parvati: WHAT!!!!!!!!
Miranda: Ummm...
(The milk bubbles, and soon Matt is reformed, along with Jake, Ocean, Nik, and Ali)
Parvati: Matt. (She sighs in relief
Matt: Parvati!
Ocean: Kallie!
Kal: O-ocean!
Ocean: I missed you
Kal: I missed you more.
Parvati: Look whoś being all lovey-dovey now! Ha!
Eli: H-hi Jake.
Jake: Eli.
Esther: I am so glad you're back Ocean.
Ocean: Me too.
Eli: S-so, Jake… I was wanting to..um to ask you if you would um if you would go o-
Jake: Yes.
Eli: I understand-wait what?
Jake: Yes, i’ĺl go.
Esther: You were Gay all along!?
Eli: Ummm… yes...
Esther: I’m so proud!! Father on the other hand... Will be quite unhappy…. But, thanks for coming out.
Jake: Who has to tell your dad?
(Esther grins, then makes a zipping motion near her mouth)
(Parvati comes over.)
Parvati: Eli, I love you, but I don’t know if daddy will support it.
Esther: We were just talking about it, weŕe not gonna tell him.
Matt: Ok. Good luck with keeping a secret from Voldemort.
Eli: Ya know what? Love is love, I don’t care if dad dislikes it.
Matt: Good words.
Ocean: Guys????!!!!
Everyone, pose Ocean: What???
Ocean: The UFO light is still on, with Chester dead, it should have shut off.
Chester Cheddar: I am not dead just yet
Susannah: IT CAME FROM INSIDE ME!!!!
(Parvati pulls out her wand and says a spell.)
Parvati: Now you’re probably gonna have to poop soon, and Cheddar will come out with it.
McGonagall: I am so proud of you all! Custard donuts for all!!
Everyone pose Mcgonagall: YAAAAAAAYYYYY!!!!!!!
Rolanda: Even me?
McGonagall: Even you Rolanda Creevey!
McGonagall: Accio custard donuts.
(A bunch of giant donuts appears)
Ocean: THIS. IS. AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(All the couples bite one at the same time)
FLASH TO:
Miranda and Susannah: *sigh*
Susannah: More for us ...wait, actually, that cheese isn't settling so good.
Susannah: Blech.
(Susannah runs to the bathroom)
Everyone, pose Susannah: *laugh*
(Everyone resumes grabbing and eating)
Ali: I know what would make this Soooooo much better!
Nik: I know what your thinking
Ali and Nik: SPRINKLES!!!!
Nik: Accio sprinkles.
(Sprinkles appear with the donuts)
Everyone, pose Susannah: SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
Ocean: Hey wait, what is that!?
(They see a wax orb in the sky)
???: It is I, the leader of the Babybel!
Matt: *gasp* PROFESSOR GILWAK!?!?!
Professor Gilwack: Mwa hah hah!
Eli: Are you kidding me? ANOTHER battle?
Professor Gilwack: A professor versus a few PUNY students? EASY!
Miranda: Yeah! For us!
(She turns into a cow)
Professor Gilwak: MILKIFY!!
Mooranda: MOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!
Parvati: Translation: I’m invincible as a cow!
Professor Gilwak: I doubt you guys can turn into cows! MILKIFY!!!!
(Matt dodges a white beam)
Matt: Nice try!
Kal: Crucio!
(A red beam hits the wax orb, it shakes and Professor Gilwak falls off)
Professor Gilwak: OOF!
Storm: And you said it would be easy for you!
Professor Gilwak: GRRRRR! YOU ASKED FOR IT!!!!! AVADA KEDAVRA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(Storm, Kal, Susannah, Willy, Esther, Eli, and Nik drop dead)
Ocean: KAL!!!
Jake: NO!
Ali: NIK!!!!
Rolanda: WILLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Professor Gilwak: HA HA HA!!!!!!!!!!!
Demon: NOBODY kills our stepsis and bro AND gets away with it!!!
Alex: Oilify!
(PG is covered in oil)
Matt: Time to die!
Rolanda: LET ME DO IT!!!!!!!
Matt: What?
Rolanda: PLEASE?
Matt: Ok?
Rolanda: YAY!
Storm: Okayy, say-
Professor Gilwak: Rolanda! Please!
Rolanda: MWA HA HA!!!! Lacarnum Inflamari!
(Professor Gilwak catches fire, then explodes.)
Demon: Yeesh.
Jake: That was scary.
Ocean: Revivio!
(Kal, Miranda, and the others wake up)
Rolanda: WILLLLLYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Willy: ROLANDAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(They run at each other and kiss, then jump on a donut, and sink in)
OCEAN: BLECH!!!!!!
(She throws up)
Storm: Those two are MADE for each other.
Kal: I know right.
Susannah: This does NOT help my stomach.
Kal: Hmmmmmmmmmm…
Susannah: *toot*
Kal: Accio stomach relief pills
(A bottle of medicine appears)
Susannah: Yay! THANKS!
(Susannah takes some pills)
Susannah: Hmmmmm... I’m feeling a LITTLE better…
PARVATI: know! Accio MAGIC stomach pills.
(A bottle of blue glowing pills appear)
Susannah: Yay! Thanks!!!
(Susannah takes some pills)
Susannah: WOOHOO SO MUCH BETTER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(Susannah starts running to the donuts)
Kal (*while reading bottle)*: Hmmmm…. “May cause extreme gasy boost….” Oh no.
Susannah: *FFFFFFFFFBBBBBBBBBBBBLLLLLLLLLLLLLTTTTTTTTTTT!!!!!!!!!!*
(She notices Sunny was standing behind her)
(Sunny stumbles around, then faints)
Kal and Esther: SHRIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK!!!!!!!!
(Storm rushes to revive him)
(Sunny springs to life)
Storm: Are you ok?
Sunny: *gasps cutely* Golly! That was awful!
FADE OUT
THE END
A/N: Thanks for reading!! This took Me (Parvati Riddle), Ali Potter, Miranda Khan, and Kal Zor-El quite some time! We hope you had as much fun reading it as we did making it! This was originally a script so thats why it's in script format as you read it. Thanks! Bye!! Also, check out Miranda's book how to be a good moo cow!
Parvati Riddle, Kal Zor-El, Miranda Khan, and Ali Potter
Miranda: SUSANNAH! WAKE UP!
Susannah: [snorts] Wuh? Huh? It’s only 6:45!
Miranda: PROFESSOR GILWAK SAID HE WANTED TO MEET EARLY TODAY!!!
Susannah: Ha, oh yeah… Oh… OH NO! GAAAAAH!
FADE OUT
FADE IN
Scene 2: SETTING: Potions classroom, students scattered around the room chatting, etc, Professor Gilwak standing at front next to a red boat, looking at his watch with an angry expression on his face.
Miranda (gasping): We’re here!
(Classmates pointing and laughing.)
Professor Gilwak (angrily): Everyone have a seat!
(Everyone surrounds the tables and looks up at Professor Gilwak…)
Professor Gilwak: Okie Dokie, today we’ll be making “iron stomach potion”,
(Professor Gilwak [PG] moves a crate of books to the front of the room)
Susannah: I like iron.
Miranda: Me too.
Professor Gilwak: Ok grab your ingredients guys! Then after pour them into this canoe!
(Everyone rushes to grab their ingredients.)
Miranda: Out of the way! Me first! I have scissors and I'm not afraid to use them!
(Everyone’s eyes grow scared and run out of the way.)
Miranda: Here Susannah!
(Miranda hands Susannah one of the books and leads her to grab her ingredients.)
Susannah: Thank you!
(Susannah and Miranda rush to look at their books and measure their ingredients.)
(FLASH TO: Parvati Riddle and Esther LeStrange)
Parvati: Iron stomach potions are so easy.
Esther: They’re so easy a first year could easily brew it up.
Parvati: I love spending time with you Es.
Esther: Me too.
Professor Gilwak: Are you ready?
Most of the class: Yes!
Jake Wedison: No.
Professor Gilwak (angrily): HURRY YOU FOOL!
(Jake quickly pours his ingredients…)
Jake: There. Done. Is Ya happy?
Professor Gilwak: Yes.
FILM STOP
(WW[Willy Wizard] spills one extra ingredient and the potion bubbles, and explodes loudly....)
Professor Gilwak: WhO meSSeD uP!?
Willy Wizard: U hee hee! Oops!
Professor Gilwak: UgHHhhHhH
WW: Sorry!!! Hee hee!
(Ava Bones, Parvati, and Miranda come to Willy)
Ava: You messed up my potion!
Miranda (nervously, quietly): We can fix it...
Parvati: You messed up my HAIRRRRRR!!!! Oh, and you stained my boots. I spent HOURS washing the blood off them!
(The two beat WW up)
Willy: That hurt!
Parvati: Deal with it.
Rolanda: YOU JERKY FACE JERKS!!! WHY WOULD YOU BEAT UP THE CUTIE BOY!?!?!?
(She smiles at Willy, and he smiles back)
Professor Gilwak: STOP THE VIOLENCE!!!!!!!
Parvati: But I LOVE violence!!
Ali: Parvati calm your shots!
Professor Gilwak: And I love cheese but it makes me gassy for days! Looks like we both can’t get what we want.
Matt Storm: UNNECESSARY!!
Parvati: Matt! Stop saying unnecessary! It's annoying!
Matt: But Senorita! I can't stop! It's in my blood!
Parvati: Awwwww…. I love it when you call me senorita!
Esther: UGH.
(Miranda pours another ingredient in the potion and it calms and is fixed.)
Miranda: THERE.
END MOMENT
FLASH TO: (a screen that says “A WHILE LATER”)
(A friend of the group, Storm Wolfpaw, comes crashing through the door, panting.)
Storm: Am I late?
Professor Gilwak: About an hour, 5 minutes and 7 seconds late, yes.
Storm: An hour?
Professor Gilwak: We were meeting early today, Ms. Wolfpaw.
Storm: Sorry.
Professor Gilwak: I shall let it pass today.
[Professor Gilwak struts away]
FLASH TO:
Professor Gilwak (close up[under his breath]): What you will face today will be punishment enough…
FADE OUT
Scene 3:
(SETTING: Corridors)
PA system: It’s a beautiful day! Let’s eat our lunch outside!
(The gang shrugs)
Eli LeStrange: It IS a nice day...
Jake: Yep
Rolanda Creevy: IT’S ONLY NICE IF YOU’RE NICE TO ME FOR ONCE!!!!!!!!
Kal Zor-El: No offense Rolanda, but you’re weird.
Rolanda: AH, THANK YOU, THE JERKIEST OF JERKY FACE JERKS!
Kal: Get OVER it Rolanda, that was years ago!!
Rolanda: DON’T CARE! TA-TA JERKY FACE JERKS!
FADE OUT
Scene 4: (SETTING: Outside, by Hagrid’s hut.)
Hagrid (happily) Great to see yer all!
Parvati: Hey Hagrid!
(Kal hugs Hagrid)
Hagrid: Ello to yeh to Kal!
Jake: Hail to Hagrid!
Esther: We missed you Hagrid.
Hagrid: Hey Ali, say ello to yer dad fer me, I miss him.
Ali: Okay! I will when I visit next month! (Under her breath) Uhg.
(Fire, Miranda’s dragon comes swooping in)
Hagrid and Miranda (together loudly): Fire!
FILM STOP
FLASH TO:
Kal: Hm, I wonder where Sunny is... Speaking of Sunny-
Hagrid: Yep! Yer Sunny his daily honey delivery!
(Hagrid hands Kal a small jar of honey)
Kal: Good!
(Sunny the bear comes crawling to the group)
Sunny: Hewo Kaww!
Kal: Hiya Sunny!!
Esther: o.m.GGGGGG. HE’S SO CUTEEEE!!!! CAN I HOLD HIM!?
Kal: Sunny?
Sunny: Yuwp!
Esther: SQUEEEEEEE!
(Esther picks up Sunny)
Esther: HE’S SO FLUFFYYYYYYYY!!!!
Parvati: Since when do you like bears?
Esther: Since NOW!
FADE OUT
SCENE 5: (SETTING: Hogwarts grounds, Esther’s flashback)
(Eli, Esther, and Parvati are walking together on Hogwarts grounds)
Eli: What a beautiful day!
Parvati: I know right!
Esther: Nothing’ can ruin it…
(A bear walks up)
Parvati: Awww!
(The bear tackles Esther)
Esther: SRIRACHA! AHHHH HELP MEEEE!!
PARVATI: OH MY FRITTATA!!
(Eli punches the bear)
Eli: Oops! Wrong move
(Parvati uses her electricity powers to shoot the bear, the bear struts off)
Esther: *gasps for breath* it. was. terrible
FADE OUT
(SCENE 6: Night Time)
(Kal, Ocean, Parvati, and Matt are laying in a field, Stargazing)
Kal: The stars are really pretty
Matt: Just like you, Parvati
Parvati: Oh, don’t flatter me... Actually... please do!
Matt: Oh, I have a billion compliments I could give you
Parvati: Hee hee.
Ocean: Can you two ever not act lovey-dovey?
Parvati: No. We can’t
Kal: Hey, what’s that in the sky..?
Matt: Hmm?
Ocean: It’s a weird green glow...
(The four hear a crash off in the distance)
Parvati: Let’s check it out
FADE OUT
SCENE 7:
(The four teleport to the unknown area on Hogwarts Grounds)
Kal: It looks like a... Ship...
(They walked closer, to be greeted by four Babeybel cheese rounds)
???: We are Babeybel... AND WE COME TO DESTROY!!!!
Ocean: This will be EASY!
FILM STOP
Kal, Parvati, Matt, and Ocean: AVADA KEDAVRA!!!
(A green light flies to the Babeybels)
Kal: It didn’t work!!
?????: Ha! Your spells are no match for us CHEESE!
??: Silly wizards! My name is Ella Mozzarella, and you can’t hurt us!
Ocean: How creative...
????: I’m Cole Colby Jack! And you are no match!
?????: I’m Peter Pepper Jack, but we don’t matter. You will NOT defeat our master!
Parvati: And who exactly is that?
???: Mwahahaha!! It is I.. Chester Cheddar!!!!!!!!!!
(Chester uses a spell to summon Matt over to him)
Ella: Give up Hogwarts.. Or he is turned to milk!
Parvati: MATT!!!!!!!
Matt: Don’t... Do.. it!
Parvati: I HAVE TO!!! You can have Hogwarts!!
Peter: You stupid girl! Milkify!
(Matt turns to milk and drips onto the roof forming a small puddle.)
Parvati: Wait... WHAT!? MATT!
(Parvati falls to her knees.)
Parvati: No.
Esther: It’s ok Parvati.
Storm: I saw it coming.
Eli: Storm!
(Eli slaps Storm’s arm.)
Storm: Ow.
Parvati: No. This isn’t happening.
(Demon Riddle, Parvati’s brother, runs to Matt, who is now in milk form, to collect the milk.)
Alex Riddle: Well, I’ll work with Eli to find a spell to get him back.
Parvati: O-ok. In the meantime, I’ll focus on murdering all of these cheese dude alien things.
(Parvati’s expression turns steel hard. She takes out her wand.)
Parvati: Accio Death 2000!
(Parvati’s broom comes soaring out of nowhere.)
Parvati: Time to show them who’s boss.
FILM STOP
FLASH TO:
Esther: Me, Demon, and everyone else who doesn’t want to go with Alex and Eli will come with you.
Ocean: I’ll go.
Miranda: Same.
Susannah: I’ll stay here.
Kal: If sis is staying, I am too.
Miranda: Take your wand, and stay sharp guys.
Susannah: You too.
Cole: You’re not going ANYWHERE!!! MILKIFY!!!
(Ocean turns into milk while screaming)
Kal: OCEAN!!!!!
Miranda: We will deal with it later! We have to go!
(They leave, leaving the attack group alone.)
FILM STOP
FLASH TO:
Parvati: Let’s move ou-
Ali Potter: Let me and Nik come too Parvati.
Parvati: Ali! You’re ok!
Ali: Nothing a little kicking can beat.
Nik Thomas: Hey, Esther.
Esther (smirking): Hey Nik.
(Jake appears)
Jake: Hey guys! Hey Eli…
Eli: Ummm... H--hi...
Ella: Oooh! More victims!! MILKIFY!!
(Ali, dodges, but Nik and Jake turn to milk)
Parvati: NIK!!!
Eli: JAKE!!!
Ali: We have to continue!!
Everyone, pose Parvati: Accio Broom!
(Everyone’s broom comes soaring into their hands.)
Parvati: Let's go!
(Everyone flies into the air to the UFO)
Storm: Hey Cheesies!
Cole Colby Jack: Storm
Peter Pepper Jack: Wolfpaw
Kal: Return Parvati’s boyfriend to his original shape!
Ali: Or you’ll meet a very Cheesy end!
Demon: What?
Ali: I’m trying to make cool remarks like superheroes do.
Kal: Super..heroes?
Ali: Yeah like Wonder Woman, and Supergirl
Parvati:?
Ali: You need to spend a little more time with Miranda.
Demon: Whatever… Let’s get on with it!
FILM STOP
FLASH TO:
Kal: Ella Mozzarella, You’re about to be fried Mozzarella!
Ella: Huh?
Kal: Lacarnum Inflamari!
Ella: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
(Ella Mozzarella burns to a crisp.)
(Flash picture of fried mozzarella)
Professor M. McGonagall: Babybel! Leave us to rest! Return my students!
Cole Colby Jack: Not a chance in Rao!
Parvati: May Rao curse you!
McGonagall: What’s Rao?
Parvati: Kinda like the sun god...
McGonagall: Ohhhhk…
FILM STOP
SCENE 8: (More combat between human and cheese. Continue fight until only Chester remains…)
Parvati: I’m out of energy! What do we do?!
Ali: HELP!
FADE OUT
SCENE 9:
Susannah: I know what I have to do!
Kal: I’m thinking what you’re thinking.
(Susannah and Kal run off into Hogwarts…)
FADE OUT
FADE TO: (Susannah and Kal in the potions classroom where the boat of potion lies.)
Susannah: Aha!
(Susannah jumps into the boat of potion and begins to drink.)
Susannah: *chugging noises*
Kal: I brought a paper straw!
…
Susannah: WOOHOO! LET’S DO THIS!
FADE OUT
FADE TO:
SCENE 10: (SETTING: Back on the roof.)
(Susannah and Kal run onto the scene and Susannah yells…)
Susannah: I don’t know how old you are Mr. Cheddar dude, but hopefully you’re at least a properly aged cheese!
(They run in slow motion at Chester Cheddar…)
Parvati: Why are you running so slow?
Susannah: It’s cool…
Storm: You’re remarks are cool, not that...
Chester: No.. No..! NOOOOOOOOOOO!
(Susannah eats Chester)
Susannah: Delicious!
Eli: Hooolp!
(Eli pukes)
Eli: But.. wait... What about Matt!? And Jake, Ocean, and Nik!?
Parvati: Oh no.. oh no no no...
(Parvati, Eli and Kal’s eyes water when they look at the jug containing them. The others return on Miranda’s dragon)
Ali: Parvati? What’s wro-
(She sees Parvati point towards the milk jug)
Esther: Oh no... P-Parvati...
Parvati: WHAT!!!!!!!!
Miranda: Ummm...
(The milk bubbles, and soon Matt is reformed, along with Jake, Ocean, Nik, and Ali)
Parvati: Matt. (She sighs in relief
Matt: Parvati!
Ocean: Kallie!
Kal: O-ocean!
Ocean: I missed you
Kal: I missed you more.
Parvati: Look whoś being all lovey-dovey now! Ha!
Eli: H-hi Jake.
Jake: Eli.
Esther: I am so glad you're back Ocean.
Ocean: Me too.
Eli: S-so, Jake… I was wanting to..um to ask you if you would um if you would go o-
Jake: Yes.
Eli: I understand-wait what?
Jake: Yes, i’ĺl go.
Esther: You were Gay all along!?
Eli: Ummm… yes...
Esther: I’m so proud!! Father on the other hand... Will be quite unhappy…. But, thanks for coming out.
Jake: Who has to tell your dad?
(Esther grins, then makes a zipping motion near her mouth)
(Parvati comes over.)
Parvati: Eli, I love you, but I don’t know if daddy will support it.
Esther: We were just talking about it, weŕe not gonna tell him.
Matt: Ok. Good luck with keeping a secret from Voldemort.
Eli: Ya know what? Love is love, I don’t care if dad dislikes it.
Matt: Good words.
Ocean: Guys????!!!!
Everyone, pose Ocean: What???
Ocean: The UFO light is still on, with Chester dead, it should have shut off.
Chester Cheddar: I am not dead just yet
Susannah: IT CAME FROM INSIDE ME!!!!
(Parvati pulls out her wand and says a spell.)
Parvati: Now you’re probably gonna have to poop soon, and Cheddar will come out with it.
McGonagall: I am so proud of you all! Custard donuts for all!!
Everyone pose Mcgonagall: YAAAAAAAYYYYY!!!!!!!
Rolanda: Even me?
McGonagall: Even you Rolanda Creevey!
McGonagall: Accio custard donuts.
(A bunch of giant donuts appears)
Ocean: THIS. IS. AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(All the couples bite one at the same time)
FLASH TO:
Miranda and Susannah: *sigh*
Susannah: More for us ...wait, actually, that cheese isn't settling so good.
Susannah: Blech.
(Susannah runs to the bathroom)
Everyone, pose Susannah: *laugh*
(Everyone resumes grabbing and eating)
Ali: I know what would make this Soooooo much better!
Nik: I know what your thinking
Ali and Nik: SPRINKLES!!!!
Nik: Accio sprinkles.
(Sprinkles appear with the donuts)
Everyone, pose Susannah: SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
Ocean: Hey wait, what is that!?
(They see a wax orb in the sky)
???: It is I, the leader of the Babybel!
Matt: *gasp* PROFESSOR GILWAK!?!?!
Professor Gilwack: Mwa hah hah!
Eli: Are you kidding me? ANOTHER battle?
Professor Gilwack: A professor versus a few PUNY students? EASY!
Miranda: Yeah! For us!
(She turns into a cow)
Professor Gilwak: MILKIFY!!
Mooranda: MOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!
Parvati: Translation: I’m invincible as a cow!
Professor Gilwak: I doubt you guys can turn into cows! MILKIFY!!!!
(Matt dodges a white beam)
Matt: Nice try!
Kal: Crucio!
(A red beam hits the wax orb, it shakes and Professor Gilwak falls off)
Professor Gilwak: OOF!
Storm: And you said it would be easy for you!
Professor Gilwak: GRRRRR! YOU ASKED FOR IT!!!!! AVADA KEDAVRA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(Storm, Kal, Susannah, Willy, Esther, Eli, and Nik drop dead)
Ocean: KAL!!!
Jake: NO!
Ali: NIK!!!!
Rolanda: WILLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Professor Gilwak: HA HA HA!!!!!!!!!!!
Demon: NOBODY kills our stepsis and bro AND gets away with it!!!
Alex: Oilify!
(PG is covered in oil)
Matt: Time to die!
Rolanda: LET ME DO IT!!!!!!!
Matt: What?
Rolanda: PLEASE?
Matt: Ok?
Rolanda: YAY!
Storm: Okayy, say-
Professor Gilwak: Rolanda! Please!
Rolanda: MWA HA HA!!!! Lacarnum Inflamari!
(Professor Gilwak catches fire, then explodes.)
Demon: Yeesh.
Jake: That was scary.
Ocean: Revivio!
(Kal, Miranda, and the others wake up)
Rolanda: WILLLLLYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Willy: ROLANDAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(They run at each other and kiss, then jump on a donut, and sink in)
OCEAN: BLECH!!!!!!
(She throws up)
Storm: Those two are MADE for each other.
Kal: I know right.
Susannah: This does NOT help my stomach.
Kal: Hmmmmmmmmmm…
Susannah: *toot*
Kal: Accio stomach relief pills
(A bottle of medicine appears)
Susannah: Yay! THANKS!
(Susannah takes some pills)
Susannah: Hmmmmm... I’m feeling a LITTLE better…
PARVATI: know! Accio MAGIC stomach pills.
(A bottle of blue glowing pills appear)
Susannah: Yay! Thanks!!!
(Susannah takes some pills)
Susannah: WOOHOO SO MUCH BETTER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(Susannah starts running to the donuts)
Kal (*while reading bottle)*: Hmmmm…. “May cause extreme gasy boost….” Oh no.
Susannah: *FFFFFFFFFBBBBBBBBBBBBLLLLLLLLLLLLLTTTTTTTTTTT!!!!!!!!!!*
(She notices Sunny was standing behind her)
(Sunny stumbles around, then faints)
Kal and Esther: SHRIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK!!!!!!!!
(Storm rushes to revive him)
(Sunny springs to life)
Storm: Are you ok?
Sunny: *gasps cutely* Golly! That was awful!
FADE OUT
THE END
A/N: Thanks for reading!! This took Me (Parvati Riddle), Ali Potter, Miranda Khan, and Kal Zor-El quite some time! We hope you had as much fun reading it as we did making it! This was originally a script so thats why it's in script format as you read it. Thanks! Bye!! Also, check out Miranda's book how to be a good moo cow!
Parvati Riddle, Kal Zor-El, Miranda Khan, and Ali Potter
